Sidereus Nuncius
by Paradox Child
Summary: Twelve, six, twenty-four, eighteen, ninety. To the Users and the Used, the Abusers and the Abused, all the important numbers come in multiples of three. AkuRoku.
1. Lost July

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**WARNING: This fanfiction is rated M for a reason other than lemons, even though I may consider writing some in later. The story contains religion bashing, self-deprecation, copious amounts of gore and violence, and psychological abuse. There's also many other things that I'm forgetting to mention in here that will come up in much later chapters, but they're equally dark and terrible. Consider this your warning.**

**Chapter One**

**Lost July**

Anyone who tells you to 'just forget about it' is a moron and should be shot. They don't know how much pain you're enduring, the stress you're under, your inability to keep from having an emotional breakdown just for hearing a word that vaguely _sounds_ _like... His _name_... _much less hearing said name spoken as if all was still calm and pleasant with the world and nothing had happened.

But things did happen, for one reason or another, good or bad, serious or mundane. They rolled right along, apathetic to however shitty the people they passed might feel, strumming and singing their merry, terribly inaccurate tunes of Change and Hope and A Shiny Prospect for the Future. All the while, you're sitting there in a messy heap, slowly but steadily being eaten away by the monotonous, repetitive, substantial amount of sheer _indifference _that filled the hidden cogs and wheels of daily life.

And while those aforementioned things are still happening, and life as we know it is continuing on its downward spiral, the fact that you're not moving along with it is the source of your inability to 'just forget about it'.

Such were the thoughts of the redhead who relaxed lazily (or, rather, tried to) on his unmade bed in the midst of a dump of an old storage room.

The room itself was pretty brown, and mostly everything was comprised of half-rusted iron; pipes that ran through the floor and those that ran along the floor were both visible on the edges of the room and ceiling in all a manner of sizes. The floor was a dirty slab of concrete that sank in the very middle and emptied into a metal mesh-covered drain that was nearly as big as a beach ball.

There were a few pieces of old, falling apart furniture scattered about the room: a slightly molding cherry dresser, a beat-up mahogany desk, a brown metal desk chair that swiveled on a squeaky ball, and what looked to be the remnants of an antique armchair, its once bright red velvet cushions now ripped and fading, the stuffing trailing out at various angles.

The lone window that looked out onto the back alleys of the city was large, the brown paint job of the edges chipping, and the glass very thin at the top of each pane, which was just another clue as to how old the building really was. It needed to be propped open with a couple of boards, one on either side, in order to let in the thick, wet, refreshing night air.

The bed, on its white wrought-iron, heavy frame, was pushed up right beside it. The sheets (a bit yellowed with age, though still whiter than the frame), were worn and old, but thankfully, clean. The duvet, which was bundled up at the foot of the bed after yet another night of the man kicking the covers off in his sleep, was a deep blue plaid in pattern. It seemed to be newer than anything else in the room, save the clothing the man was wearing and ignoring the few multicolored patches on its comfortable surface.

It was a comfort the man was thankful for. It had only been the week since the small funeral of his best friend and lover. Any tears he owned had already been shed until he was left with aching, dry ducts. His green eyes, nonetheless, were constantly red with grief, and looked rather dead to the world.

He knew the others, Yuffie especially, were mourning the loss of Demyx. They were all going about it in their own ways. Kairi had locked herself up in her office and refused to come out except for at mealtimes. Luxord and Xigbar tried to preoccupy themselves with poker and cheap alcohol, as if getting mind-numbingly wasted could help to take the hurt away. Neku had begun to tune people out with his headphones once again, blaring anything from heavy death metal and screamo to the soft and depressing kind of music you only ever hear in movies. Sora and Yuffie had been struggling to keep the air as happy as possible, even with the permanent absence of their third self-proclaimed 'Cheermeister'.

Those who remained-- Marluxia, Riku, Vincent and Albel respectively-- had accustomed themselves to leaving Station 516, their place of residency, at any chance they got. They never left together, preferring to be on their own, and would sometimes stay out overnight (much to Kairi's dismay), but they never failed to come back home when they were needed.

The other thing Axel was thankful of was the blessed lack of assignments. In a sort of twisted celebration of this, hadn't left his room in several days. He was greasy, his hair sticking in whatever direction it flattened in when he sat up. He was beginning to smell like a wet dog-- a truly bizarre combination for personal odor-- and not only that, but his already too-skinny body was taking a blow for the missed meals. Grief had robbed him of his appetite.

Kairi had warned him about remembering to eat after the funeral. She knew he'd struggled with eating disorders in the past, and was one of two people who knew all along of the relationship he had with Demyx-- and the extent to which his passing would hurt.

Though still rather young, Kairi, the female leader of their group, had an amazing insight and pure understanding of _people_ that never ceased to amaze Axel. He wasn't surprised to learn just how good of a caretaker Kairi could be when she'd been officially instated as Lady January on New Year's Day. She wasn't the mothering sort; not the kind of person that would tell you bedtime stories, or fix you meals, or give you embarrassing pet names. She was more an older-- much older-- sister who could offer good advice where needed, encourage you when you're feeling low, and who'd been around the block more times than you could imagine.

Kairi was an Old Soul, and that was what made her the perfect leader for Sunrise.

Still, no matter how much Axel knew that he needed to 'just forget about it' in order to properly function whenever an assignment _did_ pop up, he couldn't. You don't forget about someone you loved so quickly. You remember every smile, every movement, every laugh. You don't forget the times they'd cried in your arms, the pranks you pulled together, and the long, intimate nights shared. And if he believed for a moment that Kairi thought he'd be able to get over it-- get over Demyx-- that easily, then he would have slipped on Yuffie's girliest cosplay costume and made a general commotion while singing and dancing on the roof.

...Well, not really. But the thought sufficed to say that he'd have to have been an idiot to think that Kairi didn't know him better than that.

Axel sighed heavily and turned on his side to look out the window. Dawn was approaching, and with it the start of another bleak, Demyx-less day. Providing no assignments came in, everyone would continue about their grieving routine. Kairi in her office, Luxord and Xigbar wasted in their surrogate living room, Neku ignoring the world with his music, Sora and Yuffie trying to lighten the air, and Marluxia, Riku, Vincent and Albel making their getaways as quickly and casually as they could.

With a momentary glance down at his clothes-- worn blue jeans and a faded red t-shirt-- and realizing for the first time now just how disgusting he felt, Axel decided it was high time he took a shower. He hauled himself up and out of his bed, taking the liberty of stretching and cracking bones as he walked, a bit stiffly, over to his dresser.

He started rifling through his clothes, pulling out whatever articles he saw first and not bothering to match anything. Then again, he didn't actually need to; all his clothing, save a couple lounging garments, was black. Such was the practice with Sunrise. 'Shadows of the Morning' or whatever nonsense their slogan was. To _stay as inconspicuous as a morning shadow_ was one of the biggest rules of Sunrise. Demyx had done possibly the best job at adhering to that rule, posing as a local indie singer-songwriter trying to make it big. And now Demyx was dead.

The way to the restroom was long, and he'd taken the long way in an attempt to ensure he didn't meet anyone along the way. He wasn't sure if he could handle anyone fumbling over their words, trying to think of something to say that hadn't either already been said or that wouldn't make things worse.

Axel had, after all, come out about his and Demyx's relationship at his funeral. It was only right to say something about it. Kairi and Yuffie had already known; Kairi, because Axel truly believed the woman knew _everything_ about the social lives of Sunrise, and Yuffie, because nobody could keep a secret from reaching her ears. Ever.

The sudden change in the overhead lighting alerted him to the fact he was in the hallway where the restrooms were. In contrast with the clanking, brown environment he'd been in on the way there, the walls were a cool, clean white and the floor was made of that greyish linoleum that was meant to imitate marble-- though badly so. There were long strips of bluish, fluorescent lights overhead that have his shadow an orange tint as he walked, his slightly ragged slippers shuffling along and unintentionally removing parts of scuff marks from the black boots of the others.

He pushed open the reinforced grey door that lead to the men's locker room and shower area, keeping his eyes locked on the floor. It was partially wet; someone had been in there recently. Made sense, anyway. He didn't think anyone else had taken their mourning to a level where they refused to bathe for days on end.

Axel stood up and halfheartedly prepared for the shower, stripping and opening his locker to retrieve soap, shampoo, and a mini CD player. He stared at the small green plastic unit in his hands. Demyx had given it to him after he'd learned that Axel liked listening to music in the shower. It was waterproof.

The redhead gave an odd sort of half-choke, half-sniffle, set the CD player on the wooden bench behind him, then gritted his teeth and rested his head on the cool surface of one of the closed lockers, breathing deeply. Demyx... Oh gods, if only he knew how much Axel missed him. He suddenly clenched his fist as his body began to shake, then slammed it into another locker with a resounding smash. His hand hurt, and the locker had been dented. Coughing a little, he shook out the aching hand and picked up the soap and the player, and walked over to the long row of counter top sinks that were around the corner from the community showering area.

For a moment, he bent over one of the sinks and let the cold water run, gripping the edges of the counter as though he were about to fall over, his hair hanging limp around his head. He watched the clear water swirl around the porcelain basin and snake down into the drain for several minutes before looking up into the mirror.

It was worse than he thought. He saw himself, but... didn't recognize the man in the mirror staring back out at him.

The gleam was gone from his normally mischievous green eyes. His perky hair had unperked itself. His posture was drooping and he seemed to be curling inward on himself. There was no confidence in his stance, nor did he radiate that bad-boy attitude he so loved to give off.

It was a pity he couldn't bring himself to care much more.

He reached out and plugged the CD player into the outlet against the wall, turned up the volume as loud as the small unit would allow, then disappeared with his soap into the showers. Twelve creaks and grunts of water moving through the pipes later, the room was thick with the fog of all the hot taps on full-blast, their cold counterparts untouched. After he washed, Axel sank down to the floor under one of the shower heads, letting the boiling water flow down his body in scalding tendrils. Radiohead blared at him in a melancholy croon over the loud _shhh_ of all the showers going at once.

_Breathe, keep breathing, don't lose your nerve._

It wasn't as if Axel wanted to die, but he inevitably found it hard to remember to breathe for the last few days. He'd suddenly started gasping for air on numerous occasions when he'd zoned out, reminiscing on the one person he'd loved most of all. His ears faded in and out as he continued to lament.

_Sing us a song, a song to keep us warm, there's such a chill, there's such a chill._

Even though Demyx's incessant singing could get old and repetitive and annoying, a life without it there, was... Cold. Bitterly cold. He turned his head up and opened his mouth and gulping down some of the boiling water. Why... why was it all so suddenly numb? Why was it so— _cold_?

Axel was locked in his position, unable to close his mouth, his gag reflex not working. The water was going straight down his throat, and he couldn't stop it.

_And now we are one, in everlasting peace._

He felt a bit dizzy-- maybe it was because of the heat. Everything immediately felt hotter, for some reason. It was beginning to hurt. Why...?

_We hope that you choke, that you choke._

Breathe... he needed to breathe...? Had he forgotten again?

_We hope that you choke, that you choke._

Yeah, he'd forgotten to breathe again. But the reaction wasn't working... all that was there was water coasting smoothly down his throat. The room darkened.

_We hope that you choke, that you choke._

"Axel?"

His eyes snapped open and he jerked forward. Amazingly, the startling, familiar female voice had convinced his motor skills to right themselves again, and he was now on his hands and knees under the spray of the shower, retching and coughing the water out of his lungs.

"Oh my god... Axel, are you all right?" Kairi voiced, slightly panicked, and flew to his side holding a clean white towel. She ignored the puddles of water, still-running showers and the fact that he was completely nude, and fell to her knees beside him, rubbing his back. He tried a couple times to reply, but couldn't get anything out. He coughed up another small mouthful of water.

Kairi shoved her now rather wet auburn hair behind her ears and flitted around the room as quickly as she could, turning off all the taps. That done, she splashed back over to him and picked up the half-sodden towel from the floor and wrapped it around his waist just as Axel was finding himself able to speak again. He kept his eyes on the partially flooded floor.

"I'm--" he croaked,but he was cut off.

"Axel, you weren't... You weren't trying to..." Kairi asked hesitantly as she helped him off his hands onto a kneeling position, like her. Axel shook his head and gave one last minor cough, his brow a bit furrowed. No, he hadn't been trying to commit suicide. But his body seemed to have had a mind of its own. As much as he missed Dem, Axel was sure the boy wouldn't want him to die.

There was a long, somewhat awkward silence. Kairi continued to rub his back in a calming manner as a faster, more upbeat song echoed though the locker room, the sound pristine. Demyx had always taken good care of his CDs, and had beat Axel into the same habit. He doubted there was even a scratch on it.

"How did you know...?"

"That you were in here?" Kairi finished for him, removing her hand from his skin and now trying to ring a bit of the water out of her black blazer sleeves. She gave a slightly strained smile. "I was on my way to use the restroom when I heard the music. It was his... So I knew, and just got worried."

She seemed apologetic and very slightly ashamed of herself, but Axel could understand why she'd done it. People in his situation could sometimes be a bit unpredictable and self-detrimental. It still stung, but... He tried not to let that get to him. After all, she had jarred him out of somewhat of a stupor that would have drowned him if it had continued on for much longer.

"If you had done... done that... you know what would happen," she continued gently, the edges of her indigo eyes creased with concern, "You know... what would happen, Axel. And you don't want that."

Axel frowned and stayed silent, thinking on that. An unexpected rage bubbled up in his chest. It was hot and made him feel sick to his stomach. She brushed the hair out of his face.

"I know what you're thinking," Kairi whispered when Axel hadn't responded to her earlier comment. "And it's not Tidus's fault."

Tidus. _Tidus._ It was all because of him that Demyx had been killed. Gods, if that bleach-blond, beach-tanned... _freak_ weren't already dead... there'd be hell to pay. Ten times over. Kairi had told him repeatedly that Demyx's death wasn't Tidus's fault. But she was wrong. She'd never been as wrong as she was in saying that. She wasn't sincere, she was... trying to placate him and make him feel better about the situation. And Axel hated being lied to.

"They were _connected_, Kairi," Axel said slowly, shakily. "Like you are with Naminé. You and I both know it. _They_ knew it. We all know how it is. If one dies, then so does the other."

"Then you should be more understanding," Kairi coaxed, placing her small, purple-nailed hand on his shoulder and giving it a consoling squeeze. "If Naminé were to get herself into some sort of situation and couldn't get out, just like Tidus did, I would never hold it against her, and I wouldn't want any of you to, either."

"This is different!" Axel barked in reply, causing her to lean back abruptly in alarm. He shook his head and hunched over sadly. "This is... a lot different than if that would happen..."

"Because you loved Demyx? Is that it?"

Axel didn't reply audibly, but his silence said enough. Kairi sighed.

"Demyx wouldn't have wanted you to hate Tidus for it, Axel. He wasn't that kind of person. You know that. Please don't be like this," Kairi begged softly, tilting her head and giving him a pleading gaze. Axel still hadn't looked at her. He knew the moment he did, he'd be in for a major guilt trip. "You don't have to like him, or even forgive him, but please don't hate him or blame him for that happened."

But she was right. No matter how much Axel still thought everything was Tidus' fault, he knew Demyx hated hate. The man was pro-love, a peace activist, a modern-day hippie. 'Make love, not war' was his favourite slogan. He scolded Axel every time he'd gotten angry, saying that life was too short to waste any time on grievances. They'd even attended Peace Jam together and met the Dalai Lama.

It was then that Axel understood what Kairi was getting at. He couldn't-- and wouldn't-- stop hating Tidus for taking his love away from him just yet. And he never thought he could ever forgive Tidus. But in respect for Demyx's memory, he would try to stop hating him. It was a start.

After a pregnant pause, Axel nodded silently. Looking very relieved, Kairi stood up and bent over to press the water out of her black dress pants. After a moment, though, she stopped, looking concerned once more.

"What's wrong?" Axel asked, not quite ready to leave his position on the floor and his thoughts of Demyx, though he had the sinking feeling that there was something she wasn't telling him. Kairi shook her head for a moment, as if to brush it off and say 'it's nothing, don't worry about it', but then gave in and stood up properly.

"I wanted to give you an extra day to recover," she said gingerly, running one hand through her shoulder-length hair and looking off into the other part of the locker room, "But I got a text from Spring this morning. Autumn's got our latest set of assignments, and she'll be here before sundown,. I'm sorry."

Axel nodded. The large amount of time in which they hadn't had to take care of assignments had been a blessing, but they had to get back to work sooner or later. The day after the funeral, a batch of assignments had actually come in, but Sora had generously volunteered to cover for Axel. It was just as well. Axel didn't truly think he could have functioned well enough to keep himself-- and his own connected partner-- alive.

"I'll leave you to finish cleaning up, then," Kairi announced shortly after, tiptoeing through the remaining water on the floor to get the raised level the rest of the locker room was on. Axel stood up as she left, readjusted the towel around his waist and followed her, though instead of heading for the door, he made a beeline for the CD player and turned it off.

As she was halfway out of the locker room, Kairi stopped hesitantly, then turned to Axel again.

"I know you can't forget about it, and I don't want you to," she said soothingly, as if to make amends for anything she'd said earlier, "But even though it really hasn't been that long, I think everyone would benefit if you finally caught up with the world and stop watching from the sidelines."

Axel processed this in his head quickly. It made... a lot of sense.

"Kairi... Thanks," Axel muttered after a moment, gratefulness not absent in his tone. She smiled back at him.

"If you don't mind, I need to go change clothes," she laughed lightly, slipping into the hallway, the door swinging shut slowly behind her. Axel waited until he could no longer hear her footsteps, then finished cleaning himself up, intent on complying with her suggestion and at least trying to regain his lost footing, whether he succeeded or not.

* * *

Yuffie sat with Luxord at the dark meeting table. The room was actually the dining room, the walls dark red and brown and the table painted to match, and was also where they took their formal meals. The formal meals in question only took place after a successful completion of a batch of assignments, when one of their number died, or when a new Riser was added.

For now, however, there were no meals to be had and the time when Autumn would arrive was still very far off. Kairi had sent out a mass text to everyone to make sure to be back at Station 516 at 6 PM sharp in order to be briefed on the latest mission specs.

Station 516 was an abandoned fire station in the older and shadier part of the Chicago downtown area. It was part of a district that the city ignored on a regular basis, preferring to do work on other areas-- road construction outside the museum was one such example. Still, Sunrise found it to be an easy place to operate out of. Police rarely patrolled the area, and the only others around who knew that twelve people (currently eleven) had taken up residence in an abandoned city building were the kind of people who had something to hide, like stores of hard drugs-- why risk being carted off to jail just to nark on people that didn't actually bother you in the least?

Yuffie sighed and flopped forward onto the table. The air was still tinged with grief, but it was getting better, little by little. She glanced at Luxord, Sunrise's second-in-command, who was reading a book entitled _Catch-22 _across the table from her and snacking on an apple. Well, he wasn't going to be any fun. Not only did he seem immersed in his book, but he wasn't drunk either. And Drunk Luxord was much more fun than Sober Luxord.

After squirming about boredly for several more minutes, Luxord put down his book, took off his gold-rimmed reading glasses, and gave her an exasperated look.

"If you're that bored, why don't you go do something instead of sit here and make odd noises while I'm trying to read?"

Yuffie grinned. Well, maybe he wasn't as much of a bore when sober as she'd thought. Odd noises, huh?

"There's nothing to do! I'd normally get Sora and we'd run around and go have fun, but Riku dragged him and Neku to the store to help carry groceries," she whined, crossing her arms on the table in front of her and resting her chin on them. She frowned and blew her black bangs out of her face.

"Then why not go pester Xigbar? I'm sure you'll get a kick out of that, he has a severe hangover," Luxord replied before taking another large bite out of his apple. He looked down at the gold watch he wore around his wrist. "It's only 4:30, you have an entire hour and a half to kill before we have the meeting. I'd vastly prefer if you didn't bother me while I'm trying to read."

Yuffie glared at him. What a jerk. That watch was SO being sold on eBay the second she was able to swipe it.

"But Xiggy will shoot me or something, I dunno. He likes sleeping when he's got hangovers and he's pretty damn trigger-happy on a daily basis... Add in the paranoid twitches he gets when hung over, and voila! You have yet another body to dump into a grave this month"

"Yuffie, that was uncalled for," Luxord replied quietly, his tone slightly dangerous. "Don't let Axel or Kairi hear you saying things like that. Chances are, they'll rip you a new one."

"Psh, don't be silly, Kairi's not that violent," Yuffie responded with a smirk and a wave of her hand, an overconfident grin on her face.

"And you didn't know Axel before Demyx came here," Luxord muttered darkly. Yuffie narrowed her eyes at him, her chin resting on her hands now as Luxord tried to return to his book.

"And what is THAT supposed to mean, Luxy-face?" she demanded, pointing at him and wiggling her finger around near his. Luxord swatted her hand away.

"Don't call me that. And Axel used to have an... unpredictable streak, is all."

"An unpredictable streak?" Yuffie asked in a curious yet accusatory voice, standing up and planting her hands on her hips just above the waistband of her black short-shorts. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Luxord pinched the bridge of his nose and set the book down on the table, quite obviously becoming highly annoyed.

"It _means_, thick one, that--"

Suddenly, a loud beeping noise erupted from both their pants pockets; Luxord's, a classical tune, and Yuffie's, a fast techno melody. They retrieved their phones and checked the latest text message. It was from Kairi.

**AUTUMN COMING SOONER THAN EXPECTED**

**BE BACK AT 516 BY 5:00 SHARP.**

Yuffie scowled at the text and flipped her phone to the closed position just as Luxord had a moment earlier. "Why doesn't she just call them by their names? They have real ones, you know, they're not just messengers!"

"She's observing formalities, as any good commander-in-chief would do," Luxord tittered as if taking pride in their leader-- which he did. He had faith in Kairi's decisions, and as a former member of the US Army, he knew how chains of command worked and when to spot a good leader. Kairi was a good leader, no matter how passive her personality was, and therefore, he respected her. Of course, Luxord had explained this to Yuffie on multiple occasions (and she still had no idea why he insisted on doing it more than once in the first place-- probably some male pride or ego thing), and by now she had his speech pretty much learned by heart.

Instead, she rolled her eyes, hoping to nip the long-windedness in the bud.

"Yeah, well, it doesn't hurt to be friendly once in a while, does it?" she grumped, sitting back down and laying her head on the table, her foot jiggling. Luxord looked at her for a few more moments.

"You aren't going to go do anything?" he asked with raised brows, reaching for his reading glasses again. Yuffie laughed.

"You read the text, right? By the time I find something interesting to do, it'll be time for the meeting and I'll be angry because I didn't cure my boredom. And I'll make the whole meeting even less enjoyable for everyone."

Luxord regarded her appraisingly, then sniffed.

"Touché," he said loftily, returning to his page in _Catch-22_. Yuffie grinned.

* * *

"I call this meeting of Sunrise to order," Kairi called authoritatively from her position at the head of the long table. Everyone quieted down at that point and turned to look at their standing leader from their seats. Luxord, as Captain's First Mate, sat at her right. The seat to her left was empty; it awaited Autumn, their guest for the evening, who was running just a bit late.

"Autumn hasn't yet arrived, but I suppose I can give you an idea of what's coming. I'm sure most of you are aware of our current problem," Kairi said, rifling through a couple sheets of papers in front of her. A murmur from farther down the table caught her attention. "Yes?"

"Lost July," Yuffie shrugged, a bit embarassed. "It's... Well, you wouldn't get it, but you know what I mean."

Axel winced, but kept his expression mostly even. Neku rolled his eyes and muttered something clarifying to Sora, who'd been looking confused at what she meant, but Kairi ignored their interaction and just gave Yuffie a strange look before proceeding.

"Yes... You're right. Demyx is gone and we need to find the next July as soon as possible. If--"

Everyone's heads turned in the direction of the door. A woman with dull, spiked brown hair dressed in a rather skimpy gray outfit walked into the room, taking a drag of a cigarette and carrying a grey briefcase. She sauntered nonchalantly down to the far end of the table where Kairi stood, plopped the briefcase on the table then settled in the formerly empty chair, leaning back on two legs, putting her arms behind her head and kicking her tall-booted feet up on the table.

"Feel free to continue, not much of a talker myself," the woman said after all she got were stares waiting for her to talk about the new assignment specs. "'Sides, you've been over stuff like this before. All the information's in the case."

As if to illustrate her point, she nudged the briefcase toward Kairi with her boot, then blew a ring of smoke into the air. Kairi frowned disapprovingly at the smoke, but nevertheless clicked open the locks on the briefcase and rummaged through the files.

"Heh... You look like you've been well, Paine," Xigbar grunted amusedly from beside her, eagerly taking the opportunity to grab his own cigarettes from his pocket with a grizzled hand to light one up. Kairi normally didn't approve of smoking at all, much less in the station, but once Xigbar had learned that Kairi couldn't get Paine to refrain from huffing and puffing tobacco, he took every chance he got to have a relaxing smoke inside the station walls. "Light me up, yeah?"

Paine complied and shoved the tip of her cigarette to Xigbar's, and it quickly started smoldering.

"Enjoy the fag," she said uninterestedly, pulling the cigarette back to her lips.

Sora seemed to have notice Axel's change in expression at the mention of that word.

"Can we like... not use that word around here?" he asked a bit timidly, raising his black-gloved hand and glancing around the table to see everyone's reactions.

"Why not? It's the same as saying cigarette," Albel muttered, his tone frank. His eyes were closed. His arms were crossed, the metal-clad left one gleaming in the dim overhead light, and he was leaning back in his chair.

"It has certain connotations that are rather cruel, August, " Kairi interjected, eyes skimming a piece of paper. Yuffie rolled her eyes-- presumably at the use of his code name-- and started swinging her feet around beneath the table. Albel gave a silent, derisive laugh. Kairi continued. "I know you don't get slang still, but you _should _know by now what that particular word means."

Albel scowled and looked away from her. Neku and Riku smirked at him. Marluxia, who'd been uncharacteristically silent, gave Albel a filthy look before wrenching his attention onto Kairi.

"In any case," Kairi said, calling them back to attention by snapping the briefcase shut loudly, "I feel the need to remind you all that this is a serious meeting, and I'd appreciate it if you'd refrain from any further outbursts." She looked around the room. A few people looked guilty, some apologetic, and some looked bland and unconcerned. Kairi shook her head, then started passing around the folder with the individual assignment briefings. "Oh, and Xigbar, put out that cigarette."

"What?" Xigbar spluttered indignantly, brushing a silver strand of hair that had fallen from his low ponytail out of his face and pointing at Paine. "Well why doesn't _she_ have to--"

"Because she's our guest," Luxord chimed in. "And a good host always extends every luxury and courtesy available to guests." Xigbar glared at him and opened his mouth to speak, but Kairi slammed her fist hand on the table.

"Xigbar. Put it out," She said testily, eyes closed and nostrils flared. Why were they so hard to contend with when they'd gone a while without having a debreifing?

"But--"

"Put it out or leave," Vincent said coldly from the far end of the table. "Most of you have failed to see how crucial this meeting is in light of recent events. If you're going to continue to act like a child, then I have serious doubts as to how you're even with this group in the first place. There is no room for such foolishness in Sunrise."

Yuffie shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Marluxia gave Vincent a grateful look. Neku fingered the buttons of his iPod, presumably trying to decide whether this would go on long enough to get lost in a song. Riku sighed silently and began tapping his fingers on the table, as if waiting for something more interesting to occur. Sora kept sending Axel worried looks from across the table. The redhead in question seemed to be zoning out on the sheet of paper in front of him.

Xigbar, however, scowled at him and narrowed his good eye in a glare, but nonetheless dropped the cigarette into the water pitcher in the middle of a table. It fizzled out with a small, quick hiss.

If anyone had something to say to that, they kept their mouths shut, which Kairi was thankful for. She straightened her black jacket and scanned the room. At this point, everyone was looking over the files they'd been given.

"Getting back on track, yes. We need to find the new July as quickly as possible. What you have before you are your individual instructions. According to the letter Autumn delivered, there are five people pinpointed that have been scattered across the globe who could potentially fill the position."

Kairi chanced a glance at Axel. He was gripping his arms rather tightly; his knuckles were white. She felt a little bad for him, as the whole meeting was about finding someone to take Demyx's place, but it had to be done. Sunrise couldn't function properly when they were down a member. The person who created their assignments and scoped out new potential members (Galileo, as he preferred to call himself, though Kairi wasn't even sure he was even a man but it was easier to refer to he/she/it as such) had never spoken to any of the Risers in person. The only people who had ever contacted him face-to-face were his Couriers, and those four had taken on the codename of one of the seasons.

Paine, of course, was one of them, as Autumn, but she was forbidden to speak of anything that Galileo didn't tell Sunrise know. Of course, Paine wasn't one to follow rules.

_Galileo's got only a few morals and doesn't exactly care about people, she'd said once to Kairi in her office before blowing smoke into the girl's face lazily._

Kairi often wondered why, if that were the case, Galileo even bothered with them. By the sounds if it, he didn't even like humans, so why even bother with them? Unless it was for entertainment? But then again, he had information they needed-- information about what the people of Sunrise really were, and the bargain they-- the original members of Sunrise-- had struck with him entailed being his personal... people-for hire. There really was no word for it. The assignments he had them complete ranged from something as serious as hacking into a government computer for datafiles to something as silly as becoming the top scorer on a game at the local arcade.

Galileo played around with them. Kairi knew this, and she was sure some of the others at least suspected it, too. They had no clue why, but they couldn't question it directly and they couldn't retaliate. If they did, they suffered the consequences.

Like Tidus.

Kairi cleared her throat awkwardly.

"I've also finally gotten into contact with Naminé," she said a bit hesitantly, her expression soft as she gazed around the room, gaugung everyone's reactions. All eyes were rapidly fixed on her-- even Paine's, though she already knew what happened. "... One of Tidus' assignments was to take out a Ronso by the name of Kimahri. Apparently the Ronso was the overprotective bodyguard of one of Galileo's couriers that had been preventing her from reaching her destinations on time to to a slight safety paranoia... And he was Tidus' friend.

"Tidus refused to do it, and in the end... Galileo sent one of his personal henchmen to destroy both Tidus and the Ronso man. They died of stab wounds to the heart." Just like Demyx had.

"Yuna's run away," Paine said softly, earning her an alarmed look from most of the members of Sunrise.

"Wh-what? Why'd she run off?!" Yuffie demanded worriedly, pounding her fist on the table. "Doesn't she know that if she goes against Galileo, she'll be given the shaft too?!"

For the first time that day, Paine shed her impersonal exterior, adopting a rather nervous one.

"Probably because her employer killed her friend and her boyfriend. I'd probably run off at that point, too," she shrugged, chucking the remnant of her own cigarette into the water pitcher with Xigbar's. There was a short silence before she added, "Rikku went after her."

"What? But... I got a text from Spring this morning, she can't have gone after her," Kairi frowned, digging her pink phone out of her jacket pocket and flicking it open. She checked the number. It was the same as always. "Yeah... this is Spring's number, so what...?"

"Galileo replaced them," Paine replied with a shrug. "My guess is that he shut off Yuna and Rikku's phones and reassigned the numbers to the people who filled in their places. I met the new Spring this morning in Detroit. She's a Viera girl. I asked her to text you for me because I forgot my phone back at my apartment in New York. She's the strong, silent type. Tall as hell, too, and that's without those damn rabbit ears." She dig in her pocket and fished out another cigarette. "Though I did like her clothes."

Kairi closed her eyes, trying to think. If Galileo had just replaced them as easily as that, then...

"Is he... after them, do you know?" she questioned, a hand over her mouth and biting her lower lip. Paine snorted, and then dragged her feet off the table, leaving scratch marks on the surface. She stopped leaning back in her chair, too, and rested her elbow on the table, her chin in her hand.

"You bet."

Kairi swore under her breath as a frantic murmur swept the room. Yuna and Rikku had been two of the nicest people she'd ever met, and she doubted anyone in the room (aside from Albel, who apparently hated everyone) disliked them in the least. And if Galileo was after them, it was their duty to capture them and hold them prisoner should the opportunity arise. After allowing some time for them to let the shock absorb, Kairi pressed the meeting on in the direction it was originally supposed to have taken.

"We're all going to be on the hunt for the new July. I've paired most of you up in teams of two or three, depending on how dangerous the area you'll be in is. I'm going to stress extreme caution. We can't afford another casualty."

It sounded so... cruel to say that, to make Demyx's death out to be nothing more than an inconvenience. But that's what the professionalism of this part of her position called for. Still... it didn't feel right. In a masked apology attempt, she decided to drop the formalities after that.

"Xigbar, you and Yuffie will be going to Spain to look up a matador in Barcelona. Mid-twenties. In his free time he hangs around La Silla Bonita in the Nou Barris district. It's in the east end. Danger level 3."

Xigbar scowled a little and put his palm to his forehead as Yuffie started smirking mischievously. Kairi hoped the girl wouldn't come home full of bullet holes, but Yuffie needed to be paired with someone who knew where they were going-- and Xigbar had grown up in Spain. She handed Xigbar their file.

"Neku and Marluxia, you'll be heading to Phillipsburg, Montana. It used to be a great venue for gold back in the 1900's. Very western feel to the town, lots of tourist attractions. Around 13 years old. Kid you're looking for hangs around the old mine cart railways at the north end of the town. Danger level 1." Kairi passed another small folder down the table to them. Marluxia thanked her, and Neku nodded his comprehension.

"Albel, Luxord, and Vincent... You're going to Garmser, Afghanistan. There's been a lot of warring in the city in the past, but it's been stable for a while. Target fancies herself a painter, but has overprotective parents and older brothers who rarely let her out of the house. Contact with her will be difficult. She lives on the northern end of the city in a house nicer than most in the area. Danger level 4."

She handed the file off to Luxord at her right.

"...Be really careful, okay? There's been a lot of bombings in the larger city just south of Garmser, and things could start up there again, too."

"We'll be fine, I assure you," Luxord replied as Vincent nodded in silent agreement. "I'd bet my life we'll get out of there alive."

Yuffie snorted at the odd statement, Albel sighed, and Kairi smiled, looking just a little relieved.

"Coming from you, that's a good sign," she chuckled lightly, then returned to the remaining files.

"Sora and Axel, you're headed to Phoenix, Arizona. Funnily enough, the city doesn't have too large a large crime rate considering how populated it is. Target frequently attends raves in the desert not far from the city, and works at a coffee shop on 2nd street, if you're not comfortable scouring the desert for tripping high schoolers and college students. Late teens. Danger level 2."

She passed the file to Sora, who accepted it warily. Both of them were looking for some sign of life in Axel's eyes, to tell them that he knew what he was supposed to be doing and could handle it. He didn't react. That's what Kairi was afraid of, and why she'd paired him up with Sora. The brunette was something of an Empath and would honestly do the best job of helping Axel cope with what had happened and keep his head in the game.

"... And Riku, you and I will be heading to Adelaide, Australia in pursuit of an environmentalist who works with exotic animals." She waved the file around, then passed it down so he could look through it. "Normally I wouldn't be going on an excursion, but considering the circumstances, it's necessary. So Paine has agreed to watch Station 516 while we're away."

Kairi started cleaning up the mess of papers she had in front of her as everyone started rising from their seats. Oh, and...

"Be ready to leave at the crack of dawn tomorrow morning," she added, holding a pile of papers. "No exceptions. All the flight tickets are scheduled for 8 AM."

The group murmured their acknowledgement, some grumpier about how early they needed to rise than others, but eventually they filtered out of the room-- everyone save Paine, who was now reading a magazine that had been in the rack behind her, and Axel, who was still staring at the table with a stony expression on his face.

Knowing Paine wouldn't be listening anyway, Kairi circled the table and sat next to him.

"Are you all right?" she asked concernedly, not for the first time that day. Axel kept his eyes on the table.

"... I'm fine," came the depressed, low reply.

"No, you're not," Kairi said stubbornly, leaning on the table in order to get a better look at his face. "Remember? You need to start moving again, Axel. It doesn't look like you're doing very much of it from here."

"I AM, but..." he protested, giving a momentary look at Paine before lowering his voice just a little bit. "It's... really hard, you know? I've... been out of it for a while, and... it's..."

"It's hard to jump back in again, I know," Kairi replied soothingly, reaching forward and grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl and polishing it with her cuff. "But you'll feel better once you do. I promise." She held the apple out to him.

Axel started to say he wasn't hungry when Kairi audibly expressed she wouldn't take that nonsense. She shoved the apple in his face.

"Eat it," she growled evenly. Enough was enough. She felt sorry for Axel and everything, but she wouldn't let him risk his own life-- and his connected partner's-- by dwelling on Demyx too much. There was a line that separated work and personal life, and Axel was dangerously close to crossing it-- he was on the line and wobbling violently.

Axel was a bit bewildered, but nevertheless grabbed the apple and took a small bite, chewing slowly. Kairi watched him, making sure he swallowed and took another bite.

"And if you're like this again tomorrow, I'll personally see to it that you're properly dealt with."

Axel winced and turned away, but kept eating the apple. Kairi shook her head.

"And we're ordering pizza tonight. You're to eat at least two slices of that and have a large breakfast in the morning. And I'll know if you haven't," she added darkly, standing and placing her hands on her hips. "Capiche?"

Axel nodded.

"...Yeah."

"Come on. You're going to socialize," she replied, a slight laugh in her voice as she dragged him to his feet.

"But I don't--"

"Then at least _pretend_ to socialize so I don't go insane, okay?" she laughed, ushering him out of the dining room and into the lounge, where the others had taken to popping in a DVD to watch on the ancient television set.

Paine closed the magazine and looked around, waiting. Everyone was preoccupied. Perfect.

She dug Kairi's cell phone out of the bag she'd left and dialed a number. After four rings, someone picked up.

"K-Kairi? Is that you?" the girl on the other end breathed heavily, as if she were in the act of running somewhere, voice a bit fearful. "Oh my god-- what about--?"

"No, this is Paine," Paine replied in a low voice. The girl sounded relieved. "Galileo can't track calls made from within 516. And Sunrise can't know this. But I have to be brief, I'm on Kairi's phone and she doesn't know I'm using it. They're all leaving, even her, tomorrow morning. You can hide out here until they get back."

"And when will that be?" the voice on the other end asked nervously. Paine thought about it.

"Three days at least," she replied quickly. "Is that okay?"

The girl on the other end seemed to be asking something to someone she was with before returning to the phone.

"How early can we be there?"

"8 AM," Paine replied, remembering that was when everyone's planes would be taking off. The girl moved away from the phone to speak to someone again.

"... We'll be there."

"Okay. Be careful. Paine out."

She closed the phone and slipped it back into Kairi's bag. After another quick glance to ensure that nobody had been spying, she stood, stretched, and wandered into the lounge, jumping over the back of the couch and inserting herself on the cushions between Xigbar and Riku.

After all, she needed to relax, too, before confronting the stressors that awaited her in the morning.

* * *

**A/N: A storyline I've ben toying with at a leisurely pace for years. Not everything, mind, just something of a darker story involving some sort of shady group in the back streets of the Chicago downtown area. A place where everyone went by codenames for safety, or somesuch. They're not for safety here, but I can't tell you what they're for. Anyway, I finally took the story and made it into a fic.**

**I added a lot of pretty obvious movie, anime, and manga references in here. Let's see who can find the most in a review. -laughs- In case some of you had no idea, Albel Nox is a character from Star Ocean and Neku Sakuraba is from The World Ends with You, which are both from Square-Enix. WEWY is very new (and I don't even think it has a category on FF yet), and I don't think SO is too well-known. Maybe. (But they're both good games, so play them!) Also, if you just do a google image search for either of their first names, you'll come up with the right results, if you want/need to know what they look like. In general. Barely anyone in this fic is wearing their 'usual' clothing, so... yeah.**

**Also, I know they're not from/in Kingdom Hearts, but I like them both a lot. In my head, I kind of meld anything Squeenix-related into one large lump of associations, and... I have absolutely no idea where I'm going with this. :D;**

**Ed was surprised to find that Paine was Autumn. P: I wanted YRP to be three of Galileo's couriers, and so I just slapped them with the seasons that they seemed to fit into most (in my opinion, anyway) so there's really no reasoning behind it. The fourth courier will stay secret until she decides to reveal herself. :B But along with whomever being the connected partner of whomever, you're free to make guesses as to who it is in reviews. Does that make sense?**

**Also-- It's okay to be confused right now. There was no point to put in the information I wanted to give you without it being out-of-place. A lot more will be revealed in the next chapter, though.**

**Radiohead is cool. I love them a lot. Lyrics are from the song Exit Music (For a Movie). Go look them up.**

**This is how they were sitting at the table, in case you were wondering. I hope I didn't make any mistakes when I wrote it in. If I did, please tell me so I can fix it. :)**

-- -- Paine Xigbar Axel (Empty) Yuffie Albel  
Kairi  
-- -- Luxord Riku Sora Neku Marluxia Vincent

**Big thanks to Ed, my luffly beta reader. (Sorry for being impatient to the others who said they'd beta, but I -really- hate waiting!)**

**Ed's Character Points for Fangirl Moments Tally  
_Amount of points given varies according to the situation_**

**Riku: 50 (For existing! (Lol wtf Ed x3))**

**Vincent: 10**

**Kairi: 7**

**Sora: 5**

**Yuffie: 2**

**Luxord: 2**

**Axel: 1**

**PS: Author notes shouldn't be this long, I'll work on it. -shot- Chapter 2 already in the works.**


	2. Replacements

**Chapter Two**

**Replacements**

The blond boy who sat lazily at the counter of a small coffee shop on the corner of 2nd street tapped the surface with his fingers, bored beyond belief. He didn't see why they were even open today; the temperature that day was 98 degrees Fahrenheit, and no one in their right minds would be ordering coffee on a day like that. Even though the building was air-conditioned, it didn't feel like it. His idiotic manager insisted on keeping the windows and doors open because he hated the smell of coffee beans-- which was rather ridiculous. Why work at a _coffee shop_ when you hate the smell of _coffee beans_?

The blond and his coworker, a girl with wavy brown hair, spent most of the morning venting under their breath to each other about the manager whenever he left the room. And as luck would have it, Stephen-- the manager-- had just gotten sick and went home for the day, muttering something about pollen.

Their uniforms were simple. Just a plain blue apron with the shop emblem, layered over whatever presentable clothes they'd chosen to wear that day. The blond was wearing khaki shorts and a dark blue t-shirt with a skull and roses on the back.

The boy's coworker laughed mischievously as she exited the bathroom and walked over to him, looking about to see if anyone was around to listen. There wasn't.

"Hey, Roxas, your cousin's having his graduation rave tonight, right?f" she laughed, her cheeks going a little pink as she mentioned the graduate in question. Roxas snorted. She'd had the biggest crush on Hayner for the longest time.

"Yeah, but I'm not sure if I'm going. You know how the cops almost busted us last time. Seriously, if my parents find out, Olette, they'll go off the deep end."

"Oh, come on, they're not going to show up! From what I hear, Rai got his brother to pay off the cops so they'll ignore us," Olette replied, flipping her hair behind her shoulder and putting a couple dollars in the register so she could make herself a frappuccino. "I don't get why they'd venture all the way into the desert just to break up a party. I mean, we're having fun, right? But I suppose some of the people drink and do drugs and stuff, so that might be why..."

Roxas shook his head. As much as he loved her, as one of his best friends, she could be just... so naïve, sometimes. It was a rave; MOST people would be drunk or high. Olette was in the absolute minority, staying perfectly clean while she partied. She'd blow a gasket if she knew Rai had gotten him interested in X. It was his Chemical Courage Cocktail, when he dissolved it in Bawls.

"Still, I'm not sure if I'm going to be going or not. You forget, I have to come into this hellhole at 9 AM tomorrow again."

Well, that was a bit of a stretch on his part. The coffee shop was actually rather pretty and very clean, with a blue colourscheme that matched their aprons.

"Oh, good point. But," Olette started, looking disappointed and throwing ingredients into the blender. She let the small appliance whir noisily and didn't pick up the rest of her thought until after she'd shut it off, grinning slyly. "What if I told you I heard that Hayner got Vivi to DJ?"

The blond's eyes grew very wide and he started choking on his own saliva in surprise. It wasn't a pleasant feeling.

"He-- he got VIVI?!"

Vivi was possibly the best underground DJ in the southwest; his name was known all throughout the raver populace southern California, Nevada, Nfew Mexico, and beyond.

"The one and only," Olette replied with a wink, pouring her frappuccino into a cup. "Give you an incentive to go now?"

The blond nodded idiotically, looking completely dumbfounded. Vivi was one of his idols, and it was because he made all his own music. There was just something... _awe-inspiring _about the beats and rhythms and melodies that Vivi pumped out of those speakers. If the word hadn't fallen into so much overuse, he would have called Vivi's music epic.

"Definitely, do you need me to pick you up?" he asked, glancing at the clock. It was just before 10:00 AM. Damn. Only another twelve hours to go.

"What, after I just got my license? No way, I'm picking _you_ up!" Olette exclaimed with an excited squeal. Roxas rolled his eyes.

"Fine, fine. You can pick me up. What time are you leaving?"

"Well, I _did_ volunteer to help Hayner set up and stuff. So probably at like 8:00? You don't mind getting there early, do you?"

"What, and pass up the chance to talk to Vivi when he's not busy? No thank you," Roxas laughed, digging in his pocket to grab his wallet. Seeing Olette drinking her frappuccino made him want one, too. He shoved the money in the register and started working on his own strawberry drink. "Maybe I can get him to tell me how he does it."

"Does what?" Olette raised an eyebrow. Roxas stared at her.

"How he makes music," Roxas said in a tone that said he thought that had already been clear. He turned the blender on for a few moments. Olette tried to say something over the noise-- he could have caught what it was if she hadn't had her mouth full of frappucino. He paused the machine.

"What'd you say? I didn't catch that."

Olette swallowed. "I said, 'Are you sure you'll even actually go talk to him'?"

"Why wouldn't I? He's like... a god," Roxas said in an awe-inspired voice, remembering the one and only time he'd been able to hear Vivi's stuff live. Unfortunately, he'd been too hopped up on X to really register that it was VIVI (something he hadn't told Olette), and by the time he'd realized Vivi was at the party, he'd already left. Apparently, though, it had been a spur-of-the-moment occurrence, and nobody had really known he was coming.

Olette snickered at him and poked at her frappuccino with the straw.

"Because we all know you're too shy to really do it."

Roxas glared at her.

"I am _not_ shy!" he protested as he emptied his drink into a cup, too involved in defending his pride to notice he hadn't finished blending it.

"Yeah? Well you were lab partners with that one guy in Biology and you couldn't even look him in the eye!"

Roxas' cheeks blazed pink at that statement, and his eyes widened bewilderedly.

"No-- Wait, that's because--"

"You think he's cute," she teased, biting her thumbnail.

"No I don't! I like his girlfriend," Roxas grumbled reluctantly, looking away, cheeks brighter than before. "I think."

"You're just confused. And that's perfectly fine," Olette dismissed with a wave of her hand. When Roxas started to argue, she continued in a louder voice. "BUT DESPITE THAT, you're still way shy."

"I am not! I'm not shy! If I were, why would I be working in a coffee shop where I have to deal with customers?"

"That's professional, not personal. There's a difference. I bet if that guy and his girlfriend walked in here right now, you wouldn't be doing so well, huh?"

"That's-- No, that's completely missing the point!"

"How is that missing the point?"

"It has nothing to do with me being not shy," Roxas said in a dignified manner, crossing his arms.

"It has everything to do with it!" Olette laughed, seeming quite amused by the situation. "You're like... the shyest person I know!"

"Oh yeah? Prove it," Roxas said confidently. "I DARE you."

"Puh-_lease_, Roxas. You can't even bring yourself to order a delivery pizza!"

"What?! I can so! I did last week at our Bourne party!"

"And then you were nowhere to be found once the delivery boy got to the door. We didn't even know you'd ordered pizzas, you moron!" She reached over suddenly and pinched Roxas' upper arm.

"OW! Hey, I had to go to the bathroom!" Roxas countered defensively. "There's a reason I won that Bawls drinking contest, I had to piss!"

Olette smacked him.

"Roxas! We're at work, don't use such language," she scolded, snatching his drink from him and pouring it back into the blender. Roxas started to ask her just what the hell she was doing until he saw rather large strawberry bits coming out of his cup.

"And you should really remember to blend things all the way," she added with a giggle. Roxas glared and turned away, grumping.

"...Not shy..." was the only thing he muttered loudly enough for Olette to pick up on.

She raised an eyebrow as his frappuccino stopped blending, then slurped the last dregs of her own out of the bottom of the cup.

"Oh yeah? Well, here's your chance to prove it," she smirked, gesturing to the doorway, "Because here comes your Biology partner and his girlfriend."

Roxas whipped his head around. Sure enough, there they were, talking and laughing and joking and just crossing the street, heading in the direction of the coffee shop.

Shit.

* * *

Just as Kairi had asked, Axel had made sure to eat dinner that night and a large breakfast in the morning. How could he not? She had everyone (or so it felt) watching him like a hawk. Of course, nobody had actually said anything about it, but considering how eagerly Yuffie was going on and on about how important it was to eat large meals and taking the liberty of loading his plate up with anything and everything healthy, he knew Kairi had to have had a hand in it somewhere.

In fact, it had been two hours since then, and he was still full. Axel and Sora had just boarded their plane to Phoenix and were now sitting in their respective seats. All around them were a multitude of people; some of them were businessmen in suits and ties, but there were also a couple families with small children scattered about.

The plane itself was a large commercial aircraft with three rows of seats. They were in pairs near the windows, and the rows of seats down the middle of the plane contained three each. Sora and Axel had been lucky enough to score seats next to the window.

For people venturing to a desert city, they sure didn't look like they were being smart about it. Axel was wearing a red button-up shirt beneath a sleeveless black tweed trench coat, black leather fingerless gloves, black jeans, and black leather boots. Sora was wearing less clothing: a pair of black jean shorts, a dark blue wife beater, similar black leather boots and fingerless gloves, and a black zip-up t-shirt-hoodie. Black, black, black. They'd gotten several odd looks (Axel more so than Sora), but they were used to such things by now.

It made Axel wonder why they had to dress all in black, even in the summer-- wasn't one of the main rules of Sunrise to be inconspicuous as possible? If they got off the plane wearing what they were, especially him, they would be doing just the opposite of that. Maybe he should say something about that to Kairi when they'd found their new July.

For everyone else's sake, Axel had finally managed to stop thinking about Demyx and everything related to his death while they were searching for their mark. A strong ache still rested deep in his chest, but he found that if he kept preoccupied, it wasn't as fierce. That was why he'd brought along his old school Game Boy Color and a copy of _Metroid II: Return of Samus DX. _Samus kicked enough ass to keep him busy during the long flight.

However, Axel couldn't bring himself to stop observing his short friend. Sora had been fidgety and a little distant all morning. It worried him.

Naturally, something was up. And judging by how quiet he was, just sitting next to him and leaning on the arm rest, looking out the window, it was something big.

"Sora? You okay, man?" Axel asked quietly, saving the game, turning off his Game Boy and putting it in his red carry-on bag. Sora sighed.

"Yeah, it's... Just... Mm..." Sora replied, scratching his head awkwardly, still looking out the window. "My family lives in Phoenix."

"Is... that a bad thing?" Axel asked slowly, wondering what was up with that. Personally, he'd love to see his mother again... If she wanted to see him, too. The truth was, when Axel refused to go to college in favour of a career that didn't need further education, the woman had practically disowned him. She'd told him that he was throwing his life away and resigning himself to a life of stupidity and poverty. He was only 17.

That had hurt. Axel had gotten decent grades in high school, and he sure as hell wasn't stupid. Dense sometimes, sure, but not stupid. His mother apparently thought that college was the key to a happy life, and All Axel had wanted to do was work at some hip nightclub, slinging drinks and bullshitting with the customers. That was the kind of stuff he enjoyed most. Interesting people, good alcohol, sweet music.

But when he got found by Sunrise, it didn't matter anymore. He had a different purpose, and it didn't involve any clubs. Some interesting people, yes, mildly tasty cheap alcohol, yes, and sweet music, occasionally. More importantly, though, he felt like he belonged there, had a duty to Sunrise and wished to see it through. The night he had gotten kicked out of his house, he'd been found on the street by Kairi-- he'd thought she was some bizarre kind of whore at first, trying to chat him up before demanding sex and money, but after they'd talked for a little while he'd begun to trust her.

Axel trusted people too easily. He admitted that. Internally. But aside from that one time in high school, with the hula hoop and the gym teacher and rice pudding, that trust hadn't been broken.

At the time she'd found him, though, Kairi hadn't been the leader of Sunrise. She was, rather, the second-in-command to a large man named Lexaeus. Lexaeus disappeared suddenly not too long after Axel was inducted into the group. Nobody had ever found out what had happened to him, but they'd received a letter from Galileo via Yuna that Kairi was to be the new leader. There was no mention of Lexaeus after that, from Galileo _or_ the members of Sunrise.

But the odd sort of sibling bond he shared with Kairi was most likely due to the fact that she'd been the one to find him. There was a mysticism in being brought to where you really belong by someone who knows you belong there-- of that, he was certain.

"I just don't get along with my parents, y'... y'know?" Sora sighed, jarring Axel back to the present and throwing him a shifty glance.

"You don't have to go see them," Axel reminded him. "Phoenix is a big city, I doubt you'll run into your family."

He'd tried to be reassuring, but Sora just grunted in response and continued looking out the window. After a moment, Axel shrugged and groped in his bag for a magazine. Sora wasn't in the mood to talk about it-- and that suited him just fine. He wasn't one to open up to people when he was feeling down, either.

It wasn't until much later, when the flight attendants in their demure, yet still fantasy-provoking blue uniforms came down the aisle that Sora came out of his reverie in order to ask for some peanuts and water. His mood had taken a downward curve. As the attendant walked away, Sora opened the pack of peanuts a bit viciously, sending several spilling all over the floor. He cursed and leaned back in his chair, staring at the seat in front of him with a pout on his face.

Axel looked up from his magazine. It was easy to tell he was angry about something now. Actually, it was easy to tell whatever mood Sora was in. He wore his emotions proudly on his sleeve. It got rather annoying at times, but it was convenient, especially when he was feeling down-- you needed to pressure him to talk at first, for the most part, but Sora was the kind of person who really couldn't handle keeping anything bottled up inside. Talking it out was good for him. He closed the magazine and set it on the fold-down table as Sora shed his now slightly oily gloves.

"You okay, champ?" Axel asked, trying to be _that_ guy-- the one who was easy to spill your heart to. It used to work all the time on the girls at the clubs he'd visited since being involved with Sunrise. He stopped going out like that after he and Demyx had gotten together, though. He hoped he could still pull it off. But without the sexual overtones.

Sora chucked a peanut into his mouth and bit down harshly.

"No," he replied with-- was that jealousy?-- in his voice. "Not really."

Axel sighed, kicking his feet up on the seat in front of him. His legs were long and they needed stretching room. It was just his luck its occupant had disappeared, probably to use the restroom facilities.

"Wanna talk about it?"

Sora took a deep breath, his frown growing, before:

"Kairi and Riku are in Australia. Alone. Together. With nobody else," he mumbled, closing his small bag of peanuts and crossing his arms. "It... bothers me, for some reason. And I don't know why."

Axel had to try hard keep himself from at least smiling. Sora had a crush. Axel found it really cute, even though Sora was an adult. Maybe it was Sora's tendency to act like a child that kept him from taking it seriously.

"You sure?" Axel asked when he was positive he could keep his voice laughter-free. "I mean... people usually know what's bothering them."

Sora didn't respond. Axel let him think about it for a while, debating on whether or not to tell him that he had a crush-- _and_ whether he should tease him about it. Sora pounded the wall lightly with his fist, a look of deep frustration on his face.

"It's just that--"

Noises erupted from both their pockets, cutting their conversation short. Sora got to his phone first. It was a small navy bluetooth piece that was popular few years back, and some classic cartoon theme song jingled from it. Axel was slightly slower in retrieving his own, a somewhat singed red flip phone. The odd symphonic metal clashed horribly with Sora's ringtone. It was a text from Kairi.

**DON'T FORGET TO BLEND IN.**

**GET SOME REST.**

If Axel hadn't been wondering how they were getting Tower up there in the sky, he'd be more concerned with his outfit. Then again, the phones hadn't come from a store. Galileo had provided them with their cells, so that probably had something to do with it. But Kairi was right; his delightfully neo-Victorian ensemble certainly wouldn't do him any good in Phoenix.

A couple of people gave them wildly confused looks at the sudden noise-- they'd obviously realized that the two had working phones. Thinking quickly, Axel had assured them that it was only an alarm of sorts that had gone off because they'd originally planned to take a much later flight. Once they looked sufficiently appeased, he turned back to Sora, who was staring grumpily at the text message.

"Look, man, maybe you should get some sleep like she said? You might feel better after a nap," Axel told him, trying to be as convincing as possible. Thankfully, Sora nodded after a moment, turned his phone off, and kicked back in his seat, curling up to the wall. For a moment he lay there motionless, then took off his jacket and used it as a surrogate pillow.

Axel set his phone to vibrate, dug out the magazine again and kept an eye on Sora through his peripheries, pretending to be interested in the lives of the soap opera stars and musicians and actors and all the other equally messed up people. Really, now. Ordinary people got busted for DUIs and drug use all the time, why make such a big fuss when someone who was apparently 'famous' gets arrested for such things?

"Aren't you going to sleep?" Sora asked drowsily after fifteen minutes, turning his head around to look at him. He already looked less upset.

_Good call, Kairi. You're a fucking psychic_, Axel thought, quite relieved. He shook his head and waved a dismissing hand.

"In a little while... I'm reading an article," he replied, trying to sound engrossed in the magazine while staring at a picture of some pathetic singer-actress completely shit-faced on meth in the back of a police car. Her hair was scraggly and her mouth was sagging, a little drool leaking out the sides of her lips. Disgusting.

Sora made a grunt of acknowledgement and turned over again, and was breathing that vulnerable kind of heavy breathing one only does when sleeping. It was kind of cute, in a kiddie way.

After about a half an hour, Sora was sleeping soundly, a rather stupid grin plastered on his face, his foot twitching.. Axel's phone started whirring silently in his pocket. He grabbed it and flicked it open.

**WHAT'S WRONG WITH SORA?**

From Kairi. Axel was beginning to think she really did know everything. He typed a reply quickly.

**HOW DID YOU KNOW?**

It didn't take long for her to reply-- she was a quick typer, too.

**HE WAS ACTING FUNNY AT THE AIRPORT. RIKU MENTIONED SOMETHING ABOUT IT.**

Axel glanced at Sora. Riku and Kairi were alone together, and it bothered him. He wondered if it would bother him any more if they knew they'd been talking about him, and concerned for him.

**HE SAID SOMETHING ABOUT HIS FAMILY IN PHOENIX. NO ELABORATION THERE.**

There was a few minutes of silence on his text line before,

**YOU KNOW SORA WAS A RUNAWAY, RIGHT?**

Axel stared at the phone screen. Sora was... a runaway? No way, that kid was too damn happy to be a runaway. And even if he was, what was there to run away from? He had no visible scars, save for the one on his left forearm where he'd been deeply grazed by a bullet on an assignment three months ago. So why...?

**YOU'RE FUCKING WITH ME, RIGHT?**

If that line had been said out loud, it would have been said in the exact same tone as Kairi's, though laced with gobs of sarcasm. No effing way, he didn't believe it.

**WATCH THE LANGUAGE. NO, I'M NOT.**

Bah, Axel was a pottymouth and Kairi knew it. They were both big kids now, though, so he should be able to use any word he damn well pleased, god fucking bitchin' damn ass whore it!

...

... All right, he'd admit that was a bit excessive and made little sense, but the F word was his mouth's favourite, and he liked using it. Half the time he didn't even register that he was saying it. It was just as habitual as the need to blink. Or something.

**... WELL, DAMN.**

If he could think of anything else to say to that, he didn't say it. His head was swimming with a plethora of questions regarding Sora's runaway status. Why had he run away in the first place? Where did he try to run to? How did Sunrise catch a runaway? He had half a mind to wake the kid up and make him explain a few things, but he figured that it might be a tad insensitive.

But just a tad.

**KEEP AN EYE ON HIM? **

He noticed Kairi failed to tell him off for swearing this time. Maybe there was some foul language she didn't particularly care about.

**NO NEED TO ASK.**

There really wasn't. Even if they weren't taking the ultra careful route, Axel wouldn't hesitate to watch Sora's-- or any other Riser's-- back. He was sure they'd all do the same. If one of them failed to protect a friend, it'd mean the death of another, too.

And none of them wanted any more blood on their hands.

**I'LL CALL WHEN JET LAG DISAPPEARS. MAKES ME SICK.**

That last text confused Axel a bit. Wasn't she the person who'd divided them up? If that was the case, then why did she send herself to Australia? And with Riku, for that matter?

He turned his attention to Sora, who'd begun to stir. Poor kid. He was such a nice guy. Kind, forgiving, (generally) pleasant to be around-- so why did he run for it? What could there possibly be to drive such a caring person away from home?

* * *

Paine opened the front door to Station 516 promptly at 8:30 AM. Two other women walked through the doors and veered left immediately into the den, collapsing on one of the four reddish, flower-print couches in the large room.

The taller one, a blond with multitudes of small braids mixed in with her fine, straight ponytail, pushed herself up and started coughing. She was dressed in a grey bikini with a black miniskirt. She had a frayed black scarf wrapped around her neck, and white arm warmers covering her arms. Her boots were black, scuffed, and covered in mud. She had quite a number of scratches all over her body, and there were some less minor injuries wrapped with ripped white cloth and stained with blood. There were two beaten-up empty black holsters at her waist and four more empty ones attached to the bands that wrapped around her upper thighs.

"Paine, I'm starving," she whined, hunching over and clutching her stomach. Her voice was high-pitched and girly. "What do they got to eat in this joint, huh?"

The other girl just laid on the couch limply, too exhausted to move. Paine snorted.

"You know where the fridge is," Paine replied nonchalantly, jabbing a thumb over her shoulder in the direction of the kitchen. She wondered vaguely how Rikku was able to keep moving about like that-- from the looks of Yuna, she should have been ready to keel over any minute now.

Just as Rikku started whining about how the walk to the kitchen was just sooooo long, Paine rolled her eyes and pushed her over the arm of the couch and onto the cusions, then visited the kitchen for herself. She'd made food already-- something as healthy as she could possibly make. To save herself suspicion and time, she'd made breakfast for all of Sunrise that morning. Unfortunately, it didn't save her much suspicion. She'd gotten several leery looks once they'd learned she'd cooked the scrumptious feast.

Lots of people had hidden talents. She didn't know why everyone was so shocked to learn that she was a good cook.

Regardless, Yuna and Rikku had been on the run for a few weeks, and she doubted they'd had the time to stop for dinner. In fact, judging by the looks of them (both a bit thinner than they should be), they hadn't eaten in a good, long while.

Paine grabbed a large metal tray littered with the different breakfast dishes she'd made and whisked it back into the den, shoving the flowers, books, and PS2 games off the coffee table with her boot and dropping it down onto the scratched surface.

"Eat," she said before flopping back lazily onto an armchair. Rikku gasped happily, grabbed a handful of blueberries and started shoving them enthusiastically into her mouth.

"Yunie! Yuf go'a ee suffin!" Rikku exclaimed, half-chewed blueberries falling out of her mouth and shoving a plate of pancakes at Yuna. After one more moment of just laying on the couch motionless, the brown-haired woman pushed herself up into a seated position, looking battered and worn.

Her eyes were red and a little puffy-- had she cried recently? There were deep bags under her mismatched blue and green eyes, and her hair was messy and snarled. She had a thin blue blanket wrapped loosely around her shoulders, and she was wearing a plain grey tank top with darker grey short shorts. Her boots were black and half unlaced, and her bright blue necklace was threatening to break and fall off. Like Rikku, she was bruised and injured in a fair few places, though her wounds were very minor compared to the blond's. She had no empty holsters on her body.

"Y-yes, I should eat something." It was a pity she didn't sound-- or look-- like she wanted to. Taking a long, somewhat hesitant look at the food on the tray in front of her, she selected a cold piece of buttered toast. Instead of taking a normal bite, however, she sat and nibbled on it, eyes unfocused and resting on the glass cabinet that housed relics of former members of Sunrise.

Paine kept her eyes on Yuna. She knew her poor friend was distraught over not only the death of her boyfriend, but her essential childhood caretaker as well, but they honestly needed to discuss what was going on-- or risk _all_ their lives. But that discussion couldn't start unless they had food in their systems. Fainting in the middle of it wouldn't do any of them good.

"Yuna, you should eat something more," Paine said, a note of mothering in her voice. Yuna looked at her as if she were confused for a moment, then nodded, though failed to take anything else. She wasn't worried about Rikku; the girl ate like a horse. Every day, when food was available, even. Paine envied her metabolism. If _she_ ate too much, she'd gain weight like there was no tomorrow.

"Sho-- Pen," Rikku said in a down-to-business manner before swallowing a mushy gob of chewed-up pancake, "What's happened since we left? Are they after us? What's going on?"

Paine grunted and looked to Yuna, who was still nursing the piece of toast and giving her a similarly concerned look. Paine leaned forward in the armchair and rested her elbows on her knees.

"Galileo's after you. That's no surprise," she said, running a hand through her short, spiked dull brown hair. "I'm not sure how actively he's searching for you, though."

"Why not? Ya'd think that if half your messengers up and disappeared, you'd be huntin' them down and stuff," Rikku frowned, skewering a tiny pancake on her fork and shoving it into her mouth. Yuna nodded. Both of them had started to fidget nervously; Rikku kept tapping her foot on the floor, and Yuna couldn't stop

"...Well, he's already found new workers," Paine grumbled, clenching her fists. It pissed her off to know her friends had been so easily replaceable. Did five years of faithful service warrant an action that was so much a kick in the face?

"What? Already?" Yuna said, quite alarmed by the information and nearly dropping her fork. "But-- doesn't that mean--"

"He's working overtime for some reason, yeah," Paine replied darkly, banging her fist on the arm of her seat. "But why? He knows how long it takes for everyone to find their replacement members. It took Sunrise nearly a month to find Sora!"

"Which one is he?" Rikku asked curiously, scratching her chin and pulling on her thinking face. "I'm no good with names."

"Sora is Sunrise's April," Yuna explained calmly, though continuing to nervously play with her hair. "He's the short brown-haired boy who hangs out with Yuffie a lot."

"OH, him, gotcha," Rikku grinned with a thumbs-up in her general direction. The energetic blond hadn't had much to do with Sunrise in the past, though the few times she had come over, she'd latched onto Yuffie for the duration of her stay. And hanging out with Yuffie had meant hanging out with Sora-- and Demyx.

Paine shook her head and sighed. Sometimes she wished Rikku could let down her fronts and be a little more serious, but on this occasion, perhaps her cheerful outlook and optimistic exterior was the only thing keeping Yuna held together. She could see how hard it was for the brunette to even stay awake at the time, much less keep her brain fully functioning and off the deaths of two of the people closest to her.

"You're lucky Lulu found me before I found Galileo when I heard what happened," Paine laughed derisively, her fists tightening until her knuckles were white. "Otherwise there would have been hell to pay."

Lulu, a tall woman with long black hair, pale ivory skin and an cool demeanor fit her position as Galileo's Winter well. In all the time Paine had known her, Lulu's calm had never once wavered, despite the many horrific and upsetting situationsf that arose. The woman was a master at getting people to settle down and think rationally.

"Lulu..." Yuna said sadly, looking down at the floor, a forlorn expression on her face. "Was... was she mad?"

Paine shook her head as Rikku moved from her spot on the opposite couch to accompany Yuna on hers, rubbing her back sympathetically.

"I think she understood. She made up some bullshit story about how she and I had been uninformed about the... mission." Paine didn't want to go into too many specifics-- she wasn't sure if Yuna could handle it. "Thankfully, Galileo bought it. But you guys have to listen to me. You're refugees, and Sunrise is Galileo's personal collection of dolls. He's still after you. If any of them find you, they'll have to detain you."

Rikku stared at her. Her expression was blank.

"What? Then why are we even here, huh?! You looking to sell me and Yunie out, is that it?!" Rikku exploded suddenly, looking fearful and pulling Yuna to her protectively.

"Rikku, please--" Yuna started, bewildered by the sudden outburst, but she was cut off by Paine.

"If I was planning on selling you back to Galileo, don't you think I'd have already done it?" Paine yelled back, sitting up straight in her chair. Rikku's accusation hurt, but she wouldn't let it show. "_This is the safest place for you to be right now. _Nobody will think to look twice here, especially since they know I'm keeping a watch on it. They still think I'm allied with Galileo, remember?"

Rikku turned away, looking somewhat ashamed, and Yuna pulled away from her.

"Please... we can't fight!" Yuna breathed frantically, looking back and forth between the two. She focused her attention on Paine. "What are we going to do when they get back?"

Paine considered the question for a moment. She wasn't really sure herself, but 516 was a rather big place. Even if they didn't know what to do by the time the Risers showed up again, they could probably hide out in the basement. Station 516's basement was much larger than the building itself; there were... No. They couldn't risk it. If even one of the Risers found them, they were in deep shit. And being in deep shit with Galileo meant heads would roll.

There was a long silence. Each of them knew how dire their situation really was, but voicing it wouldn't do any good. In some cases, it was better not to speak. In some cases, there was no right thing to say.

"I'm... I'm so sorry!" Yuna burst out, hiding her face in her hands and sobbing. She couldn't hold it back any longer. "Everything is my fault-- I should have told Kimahri to stop it, I shouldn't have run away, I should have--" She hiccuped and sniffled, then wiped her nose on her blanket. If it hadn't been for her, then Kimahri and Tidus would be alive. She wouldn't have run away, and Rikku wouldn't have followed her, and they wouldn't have been being hunted by Galileo's men. Paine wouldn't be playing double agent and risking her life. Lulu wouldn't have had to intervene and put the safety of not only herself, but her infant son, into question.

Everything was her fault.

"I'm so sorry, guys... I'm just so sorry!" Yuna sobbed, her eyes puffier and redder than before, her face scrunched up as she tried her hardest to stay strong. Some people were pretty when they cried. Yuna was not. Especially now, when she already looked like a wretch.

"Yunie," Rikku replied softly, looking close to tears herself, "No, it's-- it's not your fault, you didn't know!"

Paine looked unsure of what to do in a situation like this and shuffled awkwardly in her seat. Yuna knew she'd never been good with comforting people in times of need, but more often than not she was still that stubborn rock of stability-- a blessing to her and Rikku, who both had a tendency of getting overemotional.

Yuna rubbed her eyes and stood up, leaving her blanket on the couch and hugging herself.

"Bathroom," her voice cracked, hurrying into the hallway and up the stairs. The bathroom was the first room on the right. She walked in, and closed and locked the door behind her.

The room was small and white, and probably the newest room at Station 516. Nobody had liked having to traverse all the way through six different hallways and another mini-staircase just to get to a toilet if they were in the middle of dinner or watching TV... And of course, when Xigbar and Luxord were too lazy to walk to the locker rooms to shave. After a lot of complaints, Kairi had approved of placing in a smallish bathroom off the top of the main staircase. The walls were white, and the tiles were bluish with bubbles spattered across the surface.

Yuna coughed, put down the toilet seat cover and sat on top of it with her face in her hands. Everything was her fault. There was nothing they could say that would make her feel otherwise.

After a few minutes of trying to calm herself down, she stood up and looked in the medicine cabinet. There were band aids, antibiotics, painkillers, cold and allergy medicine, razors, shaving cream, deodorant, and a few other items typical to a bathroom.

Everything was her fault. People were dead because of her. People were sad and hurting because of her. She'd screwed so many people over for choosing to do nothing. Everything was her fault. Everything.

She picked up a razor.

* * *

"Are you absolutely SURE you have your license?" Sora asked nervously for the umpteenth time as he and Axel sped down the highway out of the city in a shiny black Corvette. Axel, of course, was at the wheel, and going 30 MPH over the speed limit and laughing amusedly about it. Sora, on the other hand, was clinging to the leather seat for dear life, and wincing at every bump they hit.

They'd taken Kairi's advice-- or, rather, order-- to blend in, and they were both dressed in what they thought to be appropriate rave attire; bright colours, bright makeup, and as many glowsticks as they could fit on their bodies. Axel had even gotten Sora to temporarily dye his hair with streaks of blue.

"Yes, yes. I got my license when I was 16, like most teenagers," Axel replied assuringly, passing into the oncoming traffic lane in order to pass a slower-moving vehicle that had been ahead of them. He very narrowly missed getting nicked by a semi truck. Sora screeched.

"WHAT THE HELL, AXEL?!" he demanded, eyes wide and full of shock, clinging closer than ever to his own side of the car. "YOU JERK, YOU ALMOST MADE US GET HIT!"

"I did not, I'm a damn good driver," Axel scoffed indignantly, speeding up a bit just to freak Sora more. It worked.

"And you've, you know, RENEWED your license since then?" Sora managed to choke out a few minutes later as the last vestiges of light vanished from the desert sky.

Axel blinked confusedly, and didn't say anything. Renewed? Why would he need...?

"OH MY GOD, YOU'VE NEVER GOTTEN YOUR LICENSE RENEWED, HAVE YOU?!" Sora yelled, quite horrified by Axel's lack of response. The redhead in question turned his head to his passenger angrily.

"Hey, I didn't know you needed to fucking renew them! I thought it was like a one-time-thing, you know?! Why do I have to fucking prove myself again, huh?"

Sora looked like he'd died as the colour drained from his face. He turned, deadpanned, to the front, then touched his forehead, shoulders, and then midriff in quick succession.

"Lord, please do not let me die in a horrible, painful car accident," he started, looking up worriedly. "I did not know Axel was a lunatic driver when I got in the car, and--"

"Will you cut it with the religious bullshit? Pisses me off, man," Axel replied grumpily, slowing down a little so Sora could get his bearings for their job ahead. He could hear the pounding of a bass somewhere off in the distance-- that was their destination. They just needed to find it.

Sora looked a bit offended by Axel's attack on his religious actions, but he said nothing of it and merely looked out the passenger side window for a while before pointing.

"Look, there's another road... and the sign has a balloon hanging off it," he said as Axel looked in the direction. Maybe that would lead them to the rave. He certainly hoped so. Frankly, he didn't enjoy being dressed like he was a Skittles spokesperson, and another night of looking like this would make him pissy.

He slowed down and turned right onto an old dirt road. For a long while, neither of them spoke, but both of them heard the bass line get louder. They were getting close; turning off there had been a good idea.

Eventually, they found the party-- it was in a real nowhere place in the desert and far off the beaten dirt road, but they could see the flickering rainbow lights and a mass of people in the not terribly far away. Axel turned and bent over, opened the glove compartment, pulled something smallish out and pressed it into the brunette's hand.

"Axel-- no, I can't-- In good conscience, there's no way I can--"

"Don't be stupid," Axel replied with a roll of his eyes, removing his own hand to reveal a small black handgun with its safety on. "Kairi would pitch a fit if she knew you went in there unarmed."

Axel started patting himself down, making sure all his concealed weapons were in place. So far, so good. Sora, however, was staring at the gun in his hand, as though debating whether or not to take it with.

"But-- where would I put it?" Sora protested weakly, trying to give the gun back to Axel. "No, you take it."

"You don't take it, I'll tell Kairi," Axel threatened with a grin. Sora fumbled about with it before hiding it along the waistband of his pants.

"Consider it accepted eagerly," Sora said in a strained voice. Axel smirked. He knew that'd get to him. Kairi being mad at _anyone_ in Sunrise generally wasn't a good thing-- and if his assumptions were right, it'd be even more hell for Sora.

"So... we're not walking all the way over there... right?" Sora asked after a moment, looking curious as to why they hadn't moved. Axel had since taken out his phone and was twirling it around in his hand lazily.

"Oh, I forgot... You haven't gone on a member hunt before, have you?" he commented idly, only just remembering that Sora had been the most recent addition to Sunrise, taking the place of a man named Rufus, who had died in a freak accident involving a motorcycle and a construction zone.

The funeral had been a closed-casket affair.

"Well... no," Sora shrugged, twirling a lock of his finger about his hair. "So why are we waiting?"

As if to answer his question, both their phones gave an odd little beep. Axel opened his while Sora dug into his pocket and pulled out his own. On the screen was an incredibly accurate GPS pinpointing system that displayed their location in blue at the bottom. Other members of Sunrise were also displayed in blue. The little black dots represented normal people, and their target, the lone red dot, seemed to be by the DJ booth.

Sora's mouth was hanging open in awe.

"Isn't this... illegal?" he asked, continuing to stare at the screen as people moved about. Axel snickered.

"What, and you didn't question some of the other things we've been made to do?"

"Well-- no, but--"

"Trust me. Even if this were illegal, how the hell else are we going to find who we're looking for?"

Sora frowned and gave a timid glance to the party in the distance. He was nervous-- that much was easy to see.

"...I suppose you have a point," Sora eventually mumbled, pulling at his yellow shirt and glowsticks awkwardly.

"Glad you see it my way. Let's split up when we get there, should work faster that way. This thing is accurate, but as packed as that place is bound to be, there's probably like... twenty other fucking people who could be our target. Call me if anything happens. Don't drink anything, don't eat anything, and don't go anywhere with anyone."

"You sound like you know what you're doing," Sora chuckled a little, cocking his brow. Axel grinned.

"Let's just say I'm a man who loves to party."

With that, Axel made a sharp left and started speeding toward the rave, a large, opaque cloud of dust picking up behind them. They parked a good fifty feet from the main part of the festivities. Mind-numbingly loud techno immediately hit their ears when they got out of the car. Sora's hands flew up to cover his own, but Axel snapped at him.

"Rave kids don't cover their ears to music," he shouted, pointing to the right side of the DJ station, where an incredibly short guy with extremely dark skin was managing the tunes while dressed in a really bizarre witch-meets-raver ensemble. "You take that side, I'll take the other!"

Reluctantly, Sora uncovered his ears and nodded, and then they split up.

For the most part, everyone Axel met after that point was either too high to be coherent or just wasn't the person he was looking for. He'd been using the same fake pickup line for nearly an hour and a half to scout for who could possibly be their new July, and he was getting tired of it. He'd had to fend off several girls-- and guys, for that matter-- who'd come up to him and started... _rubbing_ themselves on him already, and it was pissing him off.

About ready to give up, he wandered over to the concessions table and hovered by the edge. As much as the party blowed, he had to admit the music was fucking amazing. It was like Mozart-meets-Sonata Arctica-meets-modern technology with no words. And he had no idea how that all worked out, but somehow it did, and the results were pretty mind-blowing.

A short blond kid-- almost the same height as Sora-- stumbled out of the crowd and over to the concessions table, grinning madly and giggling. He was wearing a neon orange t-shirt with a cute piggy on the front, lemon yellow running pants, and lime green shoes. He, like everyone else at the party, was covered from head to toe with glowsticks. The makeup he had on was a bright, light blue-- the same hue as his deeper blue eyes. He pulled out his phone and started answering a text. Axel flipped the cover of his own phone back and checked the location of the target.

It was right next to him.

Still, there were a couple of other people around. But hey... he'd already tried those people, so... Hopefully, this was really the kid. Well... One last pickup couldn't hurt. It was the only way to find out the info he needed without seeming like a creeper.

"Hey, baby," Axel muttered suggestively in the blond's ear, causing him to jump a little, "What's your sign?"

The blond boy went red and giggled a little, wipping around to have a good look at Axel, who gave him a seductive smirk. The kid was DEFINITELY hopped up on something.

"C-Cancer," he replied, trying to come off as confident. "Why, you interested?"

Axel raised a brow but gave a wink. Their new July would have to be a Cancer-- all of the members of Sunrise were born on the first day of their respective months. Hope rose in his chest and countered with the sickening feeling he'd been having all night for hitting on someone so soon after-- No, he couldn't think about that, even if it was fake.

"Depends. That makes your birthday..?" Axel left the question open so the kid could answer it himself.

"July 1st," was the reply he got. The blond crossed his arms. "If you're asking if I'm legal... I am." He gave a devious smirk and shoved his phone down his pants pocket. "So what's your name, huh?"

"Name's Axel." He grinned and winked at the kid. "Got it memorized?"

"Heh. Maybe," the blond replied slyly. "Mine's Ro--"

He was cut off by the familiar shriek of a firework soaring straight into the tarp over the DJ booth. Glowing sparks exploded over the huddle of ravers. Some people shrieked when the white-hot scraps floated down and burned them, some people cheered, and the DJ got over the microphone and started yelling at whoever had lit it off.

Unfortunately, the people ignored him and continued to light them off, smirking and laughing loudly in the center of the huge dance area. People of all kinds went dashing, stumbling or crawling away from the fireworks.

"Holy shit!" Axel exclaimed, eyes widening, grabbing the kid and pulling him behind a stack of coolers. What the fuck was wrong with these people? A bottle rocket missed them by mere inches and exploded against the table. Axel shoved the kid down as more explosives were shot in every other dirction, screeching and banging and popping.

"OW what are you doing...?" the blond whined, rubbing his head and curling up around Axel's leg. "That's not nice!"

Goddammit, the kid had better not start rubbing all over him, or he'd be pissed. He wiggled his leg in an attempt to get it free and peeked around the corner. Most people had fled and were watching from a safe distance. The DJ, who was possibly just over half the height of the people with the fireworks, was cussing them out and yelling at them.

He took out his phone and made a quick text to Sora:

**I HAVE THE KID. GET TO THE CAR.**

He nearly let out an unmanly yelp as the kid at his feet grabbed onto his upper body, trying to get to his feet.

"You shouldn't push people... AW SHIT, your clothes are sooo soft," the blond gushed, rubbing his cheek on Axel's hip and hugging his legs.

...Stay calm. If he got angry now, he could scare the kid away. He'd already found him, and didn't want to inconvenience himself by having to do it _again. _He tried to push the kid off him.

Suddenly, the tarp-shelter caught on fire. The DJ started screaming obscenities at the three older boys, then rushed back over to his table to get his equipment away from the fireworks and flames. The boys laughed and shot fireworks at him-- one of the speakers exploded, and a few others, as well as his turntable, caught fire.

Other people were coming forward now and protesting. One of them, a boy with wavy blond hair wearing mostly green, was screaming at the others as he was being held back by his friend, a plump boy with brown hair and dressed in reds.

"YOU FUCKING BASTARDS! GET THE HELL OUT OF MY PARTY! I DON'T KNOW WHO THE FUCK YOU THINK YOU ARE, BUT I SURE AS HELL KNOW YOU WEREN'T INVITED!" Axel heard him hoarsely scream as he struggled to break free of his friend's hold. The other boys laughed and threatened the blond and his friend with more bottle rockets.

Something buzzed in Axel's hand; Sora had texted him back.

**AT CAR. WHERE R U? I'LL COME GET U.**

If the situation had been a bit less dire, he'd have made some jerky comment on Sora's use of chatspeak. But this was a dangerous situation to be in, and he couldn't waste time. He typed his reply-- 'left of DJ station'-- and pocketed his phone. The blond had started rubbing himself on Axel. God. Fucking. DAMMIT.

"Oh my god, what's this hard thing?" the kid wondered with a slight snicker as his hand roamed along Axel's hip area. Fucking kid. Axel swatted his hand away and reached down his own pants to withdraw a stun gun-- the hard object in question. He released the safety and the kid squeaked.

"Is that a-- OH MY GOD, STAY AWAY!" the blond shrieked, falling on his behind and backing up on the ground, waving his hands around. Axel dove after him and pinned him to the ground, shielding him as another shower of sparks fell from above.

"Kid. I've been sent here to find you, and you need to come with me," he said patiently, trying his best to keep his voice even and the stun gun out of sight despite the situation. "It's dangerous here, and I can't let you get hurt."

"GET AWAY FROM ME! OH GOD, HE HAS A GUN!" the blond beneath him yelled, writhing and squirming in an attempt to get away. Fortunately for Axel, a large fight had broken out over near the three fire-starters, and nobody would be able to pick his screams of help apart from the screams of rage and pain of the brawling mob.

Axel cussed in frustration, then grabbed the kid's jaw with his hand and forced him to look in his direction, while the other hand pressed the gun to the boy's chest.

"Listen," he half-snarled as the yells started turning into screams, "You're coming with me by choice, or I'm fucking incapacitating you and hauling your unconscious ass back to the hotel."

The hum of a car engine was fast approaching-- possibly Sora, coming to get them both. Fireworks were being lit off at people at a faster pace. The blond tried to claw his way out of Axel's grasp, whimpering and trying to tell him to leave him alone. Axel pressed the gun tip harder into the kid's chest in retaliation.

"Fucking..." Axel muttered, shaking his head. They always had to choose the hard way. But the kid had fucking rubbing him. He held no sympathy. "Fine, have it your way."

Axel pulled the trigger. The blond's eyes rolled back in his head as his whole body spasmed for a few seconds, then fell limp on the ground. Axel watched him for a few moments to make sure he was unconscious. He patted his cheek. Nope, he was gone.

More fireworks exploded overhead as the black Corvette pulled around the bend next to them. Sora rolled down the window.

"GET IN THE FUCKING CAR!" Sora hollered at him, keeping an eye on the large crowd with the pyrotechnics. Everything was burning.

Axel stood and flicked the safety back on the stun gun, pocketed it, and then hauled the blond up into his arms. He was surprisingly heavy for his small size, but Axel had only minor issues with carting his unconscious body over to the car as fast as his legs would carry him. He used his foot to yank the back door of the car open and slid inside with the body of their new July. Without a word, Sora took off before he'd even been able to shut the car door.

"What the hell was what all about?!" Axel demanded, thoroughly shaken , sprawled across the back seat as he watched the rave become smaller and smaller in the distance out the back window. The kid was laying limply on top of him, one of his legs in an awkward angle up against the window.

"I don't know," Sora replied, glancing in the rear view mirror at the rave-turned-brawl. Axel pushed the blond into a more seated position and checked him for burns. Fuck. There was a dark, bleeding weal on his left calf. Axel groped under the front passenger seat for the first-aid kid every rental car was required to have. He popped it open and dug out bandages, antibiotics, and an ice pack.

"How do I work an ice pack?" Axel asked shortly as Sora veered onto the highway that would bring them back to Phoenix.

"Oh my god, was he HIT?!" Sora panicked, hitting the brakes. Axel and the kid flew forward and hit the seats in front of them. Not pleasant.

"NO, a he was just burned by some fucking sparks, but ice might help." Axel figured he meant hit dead-on. Even though the boy was bleeding, saying that would probably make Sora panic more.

He started doing a half-assed job of cleaning and dressing the kid's wound, waiting for Sora's reply. The brunette let out a frustrated noise and sped up again. Axel was going to ask him once more about the ice pack when Sora cut in tersely.

"Squeeze it, make it crack-- but don't open it. If you get a pop, it's working."

After a few moments of fiddling with the ice pack, he heard a pop. Success. Hell yeah. He pressed it to the kid's forehead. The plastic pouch was cold in seconds-- interesting. If he weren't too busy with the current situation, he'd wonder just how the hell that had happened and probably try to rip it apart to see what was inside.

"I'll distract the desk workers when we get back," Sora muttered after a while, when the lights of the city were larger and brighter than they had been before-- they'd be back to the hotel in 10 minutes. "Don't want them to ask questions about whoever that is."

"His name's Ralph, or something," Axel replied, remembering he hadn't heard the kid's full name. He buckled himself and the boy in, but kept a close watch on the blond for the rest of the ride.

Axel was able to get himself and the blond up into the hotel room without any problems. Sora had sufficiently distracted the woman at the front desk while they passed and entered the elevator, which they rode up to the 6th floor.

Now, the blond was in one of the hotel beds, laying on top of the maroon floral-print comforter. Axel was on the other bed, facing and watching him. He wondered if the kid was gay. It had certainly seemed that way, considering he'd been responding favorably to all of Axel's pretend come-ons... And then there was that rubbing thing, which still pissed him off and creeped him out a little, but that was probably just a side effect of whatever drugs he was on.

Axel still felt bad for needing to resort to hitting on people in order to get the information he needed-- he felt like he wasn't being true to Demyx's memory, regardless of that being the way he'd done things before the musician had entered the picture.

Demyx had just... changed his perspective. On everything.

Even so, at this point in every member hunt, he or she that was to be the new Riser was usually still undetermined. The power and being transferred from the previous member to the newest one generally took more time to manifest themselves, but... Axel knew. There was no possible way this kid wasn't the new July. He could feel the familiar presence he used to recognize as Demyx swirling around the boy. This was it. This kid was Demyx's replacement.

Demyx's... Replacement.

Axel was in danger of reverting into grieving mode when Sora returned, looking exhausted. The brunette walked five feet into the room when he looked up. His eyes became very wide and he just stood there, gaping like a moron. Axel frowned.

"Sora? What's up?" he asked confusedly, standing up and walking over to him.

"Fuck," Sora whined, brushing past him and walking directly to the wall at his right, resting his head on the pale orange surface and banging it with his fists. "... FUCK!"

By this time, Axel was seriously baffled by Sora's actions. Well, he was obviously pissed about something. What the hell...?

"What, you get hit or something?" Axel laughed a bit hesitantly, giving him a curious glance. He looked down at himself a bit worriedly. "Did _I_ get hit...?"

"No," Sora replied numbly, kicking the wall before flopping onto the vacant bed. He laid motionless for a few minutes before he started kicking and banging his fists on the mattress like a toddler having a tantrum.

"Seriously, man, what's your fucking deal?" Axel demanded, shaking his shoulder. Sora smacked it away, then pulled himself to the edge of the bed, staring at the unconscious July. He began to fidget with the glowsticks he had left on his wrists anxiously.

"Phoenix is a big city, right Axel?" Sora asked bitterly after a moment, crossing his arms. Axel had no clue where he was going with this.

"Yeah, but--"

He stopped right there. It had taken a few seconds for it to register, but he knew what was coming next as his mind reverted to their talk on the plane. Axel gave him an astounded look. Sora sighed and rubbed his temples.

"Axel... This is my little brother, Roxas."

* * *

**A/N: Whew. That took me longer than it should have. D I rewrote two whole sections to kill the blandness, one reason being I haven't written action in a while. Anyway. Down to business. Sonata Arctica is amazing. I blame my friend Viral for introducing me to them. Youtube search 'don't say a word sonata arctica' and listen to the top result.**

**So let's see what we have here... Roxas is sexually confused (it was the drugs that were making him loopy) and now injured, Sora's got a crush unknown to him, is a runaway, and issues with his family, Paine's harboring Rikku and Yuna at the Sunrise HQ, Yuna's not in a very pleasant spot at the moment, Axel's a lunatic driver who hates people rubbing on him, and Roxas and Sora are brothers.**

**I told you all less information than I'd have liked to, but hey, surprise-surprise, Roxas is the new July. I don't think people were surprised, however, to learn that Sora and Roxas are brothers. But maybe you were. Tell me in a review? D**

**Once again, thanks heaps to my beta, the lovely Ed, and a thanks-in-advance to Fiona, who (if she ever gets online! D) will be my second beta for the series. D**

**Ed's Character Points for Fangirl Moments Tally**

_**Amount of points given and totals vary depending on multiple situations**_

**Axel: 85 (For being generally sexy)**

**Riku: 50 (For existing, once again. xD)**

**Sora: 50 (Kidnapping his brother does not equal incest, thank you very much, but I'll let the points stay!)**

**Rufus: 10 (WTF ED? I ONLY MENTIONED HIM IN PASSING!)**

**Paradox Child: 10 (o.o I don't even remember why you gave me points...)**


	3. Secrets

**Chapter Three**

**Secrets**

_The long grass rippled in the slight morning wind. The sun gleamed down on the green hill from its position in the sky. The occasional lazy cloud drifted past, throwing the world into momentary shadow. The hill broke at the bottom into a long, fragrant field of flowers. It was filled with yellows, pinks, and blues that eventually melted into a vast body of calm, sparkling blue water._

_No birds chirped merrily in the branches of the trees at the edges of the hill and meadow, no noises from a nearby town entered the area, and not even the soft shush of the breeze was present._

_All was unnaturally silent._

_Axel sat just below the crown of the hill, his knees drawn up and his arms loosely hooked around his legs, staring out at the expanse of blue. He wasn't sure whether it was the sky or the lake he was looking at; as far as he was concerned, as long as it didn't stop being pretty, it didn't matter which._

_He had no recollection of how he'd gotten there, or why he was sitting on the grassy knoll, but if he had to slap an opinion on it, he wouldn't be able to. Axel had no opinion of the situation. He coexisted with it numbly, just accepted that it was there and __everything __else wasn't. He wouldn't exactly call it apathy, but the term cut close to just how different he always felt while on that hill. It was as if he was so entranced by the eternally calm, mute atmosphere that there was no need to feel at all._

_Finally-- after what seemed to be hours of sitting and staring at the lake, perhaps__waiting for something to breach its glossy surface-- noise. Slow footsteps through the grass came up from behi__nd him__, bringing the world of sound crashing back around Axel's ears. Birds chirped. The rustle of grass was light and pleasant. Somewhere not too far away, a bee buzzed, presumably collecting nectar from the wildflowers. Axel lay back on the grass and tilted his head to see who approached._

_The boy seemed to be younger than he was. He had a baby face __with__bright blue eyes, and dirty blond hair __that was__ spiked up into an odd faux-hawk. He smiled warmly down at Axe__l,__gave a small wave, __and then sat next to him on the hill. His legs sprawled out in front of him as he leaned back on his hands._

_Demyx._

_Demyx was here. Everything was okay again._

_They sat in calm silence for a long while, like always, enjoying the quiet together time. Demyx was staring out at the lake. Axel was staring at Demyx. The boy had on that same serene smile he wore whenever he was with Axel. His warm-toned skin was smooth and healthy-looking. His fingernails were chewed down and his cuticles damaged. His fingers were slightly calloused from plucking the strings of his various instruments all day long. The thick red laces of his black shoes were undone. His denim shorts were baggy and worn; Axel knew this particular pair had a small hole in the back. His vintage bright blue t-shirt had a Jefferson Airplane logo plastered on the back, with a smaller version over his heart on the front. His arms were littered with beaded hemp jewelry. A single hemp necklace and a pair of gigantic, black, old-school headphones were around his neck, the cord leading to the white iPod in his pocket._

_The numbness had left Axel when Demyx arrived. Just like always._

"_The daisies don't stink this year," the blond noted happily. _

"_Yeah... It's actually pleasant for once," __Axel grunted in response._

_Demyx chuckled inwardly, his gaze trailing all over the field. Axel continued to watch him. It was idle chatter. And idle chatter with Demyx always meant something was bothering him. __Axel furrowed his brow, wondering what could be disturbing this serene meadow-- a place that was quite possibly their last place of solace left on the planet. _

_Demyx sighed eventually, his smile faltering ever so slightly, but never removing itself from his lips. He turned to Axel, "...So," Demyx began lightheartedly, scratching the back of his head, "You've... You've found my replacement, huh?"_

_Axel stared at him a few moments longer, then shot back into a seated position, a hurt expression on his face. "No! It's not like that!" Axel replied frantically, leaning toward him. "_You're _July, not this brat!"_

_Demyx and his oddly content smile were focused on the ground between them. When he shook his head, Axel continued, his voice breaking slightly, "You're _my_ July... And... Nobody can ever replace you."_

_Demyx gave another inward chuckle and turned his attention back out onto the lake as Axel cast around wildly for things to say. He needed something-- anything-- to prove to Demyx that _he_ would always be the real July, not some annoying blond tripper. _

"_And what about the person who was July before me?" Demyx asked gently after a moment's thought. "What about him, huh? Wasn't he the real July, too?"_

_Axel didn't know what to say. Demyx was... well, right, but... _

_There was another silence in which Axel still racked his brain trying to figure out something to help his argument. There seemed to be a lot of silences between them lately, even if they all happened here, on this hill. Demyx spoke again, "I'm not as special as you think I was, Ax." He chuckled a bit tiredly, and then turned to his still-living old lover. "I wasn't as much of myself as you seem to think I am. You've already started to realize that, even though you don't know it."_

_When Axel gave him a completely bemused look, Demyx snickered._

"_You were never good at reading yourself, Axel. I personally think you're your mind's biggest mystery, you know? You understand other people... so why not yourself, huh? But don't answer that." He turned back to the ocean. Axel was, unfortunately, _still_ groping about for a response, albeit a different one. _

_What was Demyx talking about? Of course Axel knew himself. He knew his favourite breakfast food was cold pizza, that he preferred cloudy or rainy days to sunny ones, that he enjoyed experimenting with clothing, that he hated rodents, that he had no fully-formed political opinions, but rather just passing thoughts and weak stances on various issues. Hell, if anything, Axel thought he knew himself pretty damn well. Demyx must have been blind as a bat._

_But not only that, Demyx was being... cryptic. About everything. And that was very much unlike him. Regardless of whether he was right or wrong, was it customary for the dead to taunt the living in such a way?_

"_Hey... Dem, are you okay?" Axel ventured softly, scratching the back of his neck and shifting awkwardly into a more upright seated position. Demyx looked as if he were about to say 'yes, everything is perfectly fine' with that fake zero-smile he always used when telling a white lie about his mood, but faltered at the last moment._

"_Well... No."_

_Axel's face fell. That crushed him. Just as he was about to say something in return, Demyx held up his hand to shush him._

"_But I will be, soon," Demyx said in a more lighthearted, hopeful tone, looking up at the sky. "I know it, man. I just know it."_

"_But HOW exactly do you know that?!" Axel burst out suddenly, his eyes burning and his fists clenched and making Demyx jump in alarm. He could taste of blood in his mouth; he'd bitten on the inside of his cheek to keep from crying a bit too hard. And it wasn't helping much. "You don't... KNOW that! You're fucking DEAD, Demyx, how will you be okay? How will ANYTHING be okay?!"_

_Axel hunched over in a cross-legged position, resting his head and hiding his face in one hand, the other balled into a fist on his knee. It... He felt ashamed, for Demyx to be seeing him when he was in such a state. But then again, nobody else needed to._

_Demyx cringed painfully and scooted up close to Axel, wrapping his arms around him in a half-hug and rubbing his back in a soothing manner. The redhead forced back sniffles for a few minutes,__ and th__en inhaled several deep, calming breaths, the wind catching in his throat occasionally. Eventually, he found himself able to talk again amidst Demyx's pacifying cuddles._

"_I'm falling apart at the seams without you, Dem," Axel remarked thickly, his voice sullen and carrying a twinge of something that resembled embarrassment. "I wish you'd come back."_

_Axel wasn't one to readily admit he couldn't do something, or that he'd failed. Such things weren't within his scope of abilities. And he felt like he was failing without Demyx by his side. Demyx sighed and gave him a squeeze._

"_I can't, Axel. Even if I could, I wouldn't want to."_

_Axel froze. Did he just say--?_

"_What do you mean, Dem?" Axel asked slowly, turning around to face him through slightly puffy, red eyes, expression hesitant. What was he talking about? Why wouldn't he want to come back? Unless... Oh god..._

_Demyx clamped his hands over his mouth, his eyes widening at a snail's pace, as though horrified by what he'd just said. They stared at each other._

"_Look, I've said too much already," Demyx replied hastily, jumping to his feet and glancing around nervously. He dragged Axel to his feet and brushed him off while the redhead stood there like a lump, gazing off past Demyx's shoulder. Axel's mind was buzzing with horrific what-ifs. What if Demyx didn't really love him? What if he'd found someone else in the afterlife? What if he had been contemplating suicide anyway? Oh god... Even a single one of those thoughts was enough to make him feel sick, but this... this might be the one thing that could possibly make losing his lover all the more terrible._

"_Anyway, it's late, and you need to wake up. Kairi's coming," Demyx continued as he straightened Axel's clothes. That done, he reached up and gave Axel a quick peck on the cheek before turning to hurry back over the crest of the hill..._

"_Dem...?" Axel called out miserably after him, looking like a lost, kicked puppy and not quite sure if he could believe what was happening._

"_We'll talk later, Axel!" Demyx called back as he started the descent down the other side of the hill. Axel watched his retreating form, stunned, until the boy was completely out of sight._

_The sound had crept away with Demyx. No birds chirped, no bees buzzed. There was no gentle whoosh of the breeze flowing through the long grass, or the calm sloshing of the lake waters against the rocks on the beach._

_Axel suddenly felt terrifyingly alone._

"_DEMYX?!"_

"AXEL!"

Axel jolted upright in the hotel bed, panting and shivering. Sora was hovering over him, his hand on Axel's shoulder, shaking him. The boy had deep, purple circles under his eyes. He looked as though he hadn't slept a wink. Not that it was much of a sleep anyway; a quick glance at the digital clock said it was 4 AM.

"Sora...? Fucking hell, what--?" Axel murmured groggily, but he was cut off.

"Roxas is waking up and I don't know what to do!" Sorra hissed, throwing an alarmed look behind him at his stirring brother. Axel cursed under his breath and ripped the covers off himself, rubbing his arms in an attempt to warm himself up. A normal person's body temperature dropped when they slept, but his, unfortunately, dropped more than normal. And he hated it. He didn't mind the air being cool, or it being cold outside, as long as he wasn't chilled through.

Roxas pushed himself up groggily, still half asleep and groaning in discomfort. Sora winced and ducked behind Axel, who grabbed his collar and thrust him toward Roxas' bed.

"Idunnowhattodo!" Sora breathed, immediately scurrying away again. Axel clenched his teeth and breathed in deeply, rubbing his face with his hand. Gah, Sora-- fucking pansy. So Axel had to get the damn kid AND give him the rundown, too? The redhead grumpily shoved his hands in his pockets and watched Roxas rubbed his eyes.

"Wh--" Roxas started, throwing a ridiculously perplexed look at his surroundings, trying to remember just what the HELL had happened the night before, when his eyes fell on Axel. He stared. There was something about that tall guy he knew he should be remembering, but... Axel rolled his eyes and sighed.

"Morning, sweetie," Axel exclaimed in a falsely motherly tone, "Sleep well?"

It was the voice that jogged his memory. Roxas jumped and pushed himself farther away from Axel with an almost fearful shriek, falling off the bed and landing painfully in the small gap between the bed and the wall.

"YOU FREAK! YOU TAZED ME!" Roxas screamed, struggling to both get out of the awkward position and check himself for injuries at the same time. He'd-- _oh god_, this was a hotel room, and... Ohgodoh_god_. Had this guy RAPED him?! Oh no. Oh shit. Oh _fuck._

Axel, meanwhile scoffed in resentment, crossing his arms and glaring off at the sliding glass door that led to the balcony.

"You fucking _rubbed_ yourself on me," Axel grumbled, not bothering to give Roxas a hand-- not that Roxas expected it, or wanted it for that matter. As far as he was concerned, anything that brought the possible rapist closer to him was something he was better off without.

"So you _tazed_ me?!" Roxas repeated in disbelief as he finally got to a standing position. Suddenly, he felt a tight pain in his leg, causing him to lose balance in surprise and nearly topple over as a result. He looked down; bandaging was falling loose, revealing a rather nasty wound. Roxas laughed in disbelief. "AND YOU _RAPED_ ME?!"

"What the hell?!" Axel demanded in alarm, holding up his hands and taking a step backward. "Look, kid, I did NOT fucking rape your--"

"OH MY GOD WHAT WILL MOM SAY?!" Roxas panicked, pressed up as best he could to the wall while favouring his hurt leg. Axel threw Roxas a dirty and look and hissed at Sora behind him, who was now making a break for the door. Upon finding he was caught, the brunette sheepishly turned around, thought did his best to keep his face hidden.

Axel rubbed his hands again, but Roxas took no notice. Oh god. He... He'd been raped, and it was all over because he was obviously pregnant, but-- wait, no, that wasn't right, he wasn't a girl, and... Oh god, he only knew this bastard's first name, and nothing else about him, and he wasn't sure if the cops would even be able to catch him for it, and...

"I'm SO going to bring you down for fucking—what the hell's it called-- statutory rape!" Roxas moaned agonizingly, feeling incredibly violated. Even if he wasn't sure if he'd be able to catch Axel for it, the threat would... Well, do _something_, he hoped...

"Whoa-ho-ho, SLOWthe fuck down, kid! You told me you were legal last night!" Axel yelled, obviously taken aback by the statement. After a split-second's thought, however, he wore under his breath and ran a hand through his hair. "FUCK, that sounds bad, but I SWEAR I haven't touched you-- SORA get your ASS over here and talk to this damn nutcase!"

Roxas stopped his frantic screaming and whining at the mention of the name Sora. Once Roxas took a better look around the room instead of immediately focusing in on his possible-rapist, he noticed a short guy with spiky brown hair leaning against the wall opposite him, half hidden behind Axel and turned away. Roxas stared at the guy as Axel argued with him. Sora... that was his brother's name. His goddamned bastard of a brother's name. If...

Suddenly, Axel grabbed Sora and dragged him forward by his jacket, thrusting him onto Roxas' vacated bed. Sora immediately flinched away, a nervously uncertain look on his face, keeping his eyes fixed on the blond's.

There was a short silence in which Roxas's stomach started bubbling with a hot fury. There was no mistaking it. This was his brother. His goddamned bastard of a brother.

"You," Roxas growled, eyes widening and fists clenching in rage, trying to keep his temper even. The-- the _nerve_ of him, even coming back--

"Roxas, I can explain-- Dad, he was--" Sora tried hurriedly, waving his hands.

"I _know_ what the hell 'Dad' was doing," Roxas bit, his teeth grinding together harshly. No... He wouldn't get like _that_, it'd be just... No, just stay calm... "I know _all_ of it. You fucking _pussy. _You _abandoned_ me. You abandoned _M__om!_"

"No, Roxas, I really didn't! If you'd just listen--"

"If I'd listen?! No, _you're_ the one that needs to listen, Sora!" Roxas coughed a little, his voice becoming hoarse from all the yelling. Nevertheless, he continued to send Sora the dirtiest looks he could. Axel was watching the scene apprehensively. Two cellphones chimed their text alert jingles, but they went ignored by both their owners. Axel fingered his in his pocket, but did nothing more than that. After several moments of heavy breathing on Roxas' end, the boy continued.

"After you left," he began, his voice quavering, "_That_ man started beating mom again. Worse than before."

Sora's face mutated into an expression of horror.

"But-- But he said--"

Roxas scoffed derisively.

"And you _believed_ him?" he asked with a sneer, his fists tightening. "After all those goddamned _lies_?"

Sora gulped. Axel and his possible-rapistness was out of Roxas' mind now. All he could picture was his poor slip of a mother lying on her bedroom floor, covered in bright red weals and a dark rainbow of bruises. But never blood, and never on her face or anywhere that might be visible.

He recalled one occasion when he'd found her nearly unconscious, draped over the side of the bathtub. Roxas had gotten off of his youth struggle practice early and wandered into the bathroom to take a piss, and there she was. Her shoulder-length blond hair was completely messed, her clothes were disheveled-- and some of them were half off. Her makeup was smeared and mascara ran down her face in thin trails.

And, of course, she'd told Roxas in a weary, pain-ridden voice that everything would be fine and he should go outside to wait for Sora to come home. The corners of her mouth cracked into an exhausted smile as she said it.

The memory only fueled Roxas' rage.

"All those promises he made," Roxas continued as Sora eyed him tentatively. The brunette's mouth kept opening as if he were trying to find an opening to say something, but nothing ever came. "All those promises he broke. And you believed him _that_ time?!"

"But you don't understand, he--"

Snap.

Roxas tackled Sora down onto the bed, one hand grabbing a fistful of his brother's hair and the other clamping onto the front of his shirt. Sora screeched in alarm, flailing around in his attempt to get away. Roxas started shaking him violently, whipping him back and forth as fast as he was able to.

"YOU FUCKING LEFT, YOU BASTARD, WHAT'S MORE TO UNDERSTAND?!" Roxas snarled viciously as he thrust Sora down onto the bed as hard as he could. Sora yelped in pain, trying to pry his hair away from Roxas' hands. Axel was too stunned by the outburst to move.

"ROXAS, STOP!" Sora shrieked, twisting and turning and trying to knee Roxas where it would hurt. Roxas yanked him up and shoved him back down again.

"HE BEAT HER AND RAPED HER AND THEN HE FUCKING STARTED ON _ME_, YOU BASTARD!" Roxas choked, beginning to become blinded with tears of rage. Axel's brain seemed to have kicked in, as he dove for the two on the bed, sliding his arms between the two and attempting to separate them.

"GET THE HELL OFF, KID!" Axel roared, his nails gripping into Roxas' chest and trying to push him away. Roxas hissed in pain and removed the hand he'd been holding Sora's shirt with, balled it into a tight fist and swung it at Axel, who hollered in pain as it connected with the side of his head in a crack. Axel stumbled backward, making repetitive use of his favourite word as his hand shot up to cover his injury.

"ROXAS, NO, STOP! YOU'VE GOT IT WRONG!" Sora cried, thoroughly terrified and trying to get Roxas to release his grip on his hair.

"YOU WANTED MOM TO TAKE ALL OF IT, DIDN'T YOU?!" Roxas bellowed hoarsely, his nose running a little. He slapped Sora across the face as hard as he could muster. "YOU _KNEW _SHE'S HAD A HISTORY OF DATING ABUSIVE MEN, AND YOU _KNEW_ THAT THIS ONE WOULD LET UP OCCASIONALLY BEAUSE _YOU_ WERE THERE!"

"SO YOU WANTED HIM TO BEAT _ME,_ IS THAT IT?!" Sora replied hysterically, tears trailing down his face, too.

"WE SWORE TO PROTECT HER!" Roxas coughed, his voice cracking as he gave another sound smack to Sora's face. Shit... Shit, he was doing it. No, he... He couldn't be like _that_... He had to stop, but... "EVER SINCE THE SECOND GUY, WE SWORE WE'D DO ANYTHING WE COULD TO KEEP HER AS SAFE AS FUCKING POSSIBLE!"

"BUT SHE WOULDN'T WANT US TO GET HURT IN THE PROCESS!" Sora pleaded, having stopped most of his squirming as Roxas' grip on him had loosened somewhat. "And he-- he told me he'd STOP if I left!" Sora whimpered, unable to yell any longer.

"And you believed him?!" Roxas choked again, his complete incredulity inhibiting his ability to yell. It was probably a good thing, because he'd be less inclined to... To hurt him again. Roxas sniffled and put his hands down on the bed to support himself, then hung his head and let it rest on his brother's shoulder. "You... You believed him? After all the other times he's promised to stop?"

Sora looked away ashamedly, not saying anything. They all sat in silence for a good long while; Axel felt it was no longer necessary to intervene because the hostilities, as it seemed, had ended.

"I'm sorry," Sora muttered miserably after a while, sniffing and rubbing his red, puffy eyes with his fist before tentatively wrapping his arms around Roxas. Shaking, Roxas returned the gesture.

"I hate you Sora," Roxas whispered as they clung to one another, keeping his face hidden. "I hate you so much."

Sora's face fell a little, but it looked as though he didn't expect anything else.

"... I know."

* * *

Well, _that_ had been a trip and a half.

Marluxia sighed as he and Neku disembarked one of the crowded city buses they'd taken from the airport. They were trying to be courteous and not hit anyone as they passed down the narrow walkway, though crammed as it was, it was proving to be quite an endeavor of its own.

The kid they'd been after-- someone named Ronald Hampton-- had been hit by a train mere hours after they'd landed at the airport in Billings. Once they'd gotten to Phillipsburg, they'd traced the dot to the nearby hospital, where their mark had been in critical condition. How he'd survived getting hit by a _train _of all things, Marluxia didn't know, but apparently he did. For a while, at least.

After loitering around in the waiting room and trying to figure out what they were going to do for a good few hours, the screens of their phones flashed a message.

**TARGET DECEASED**

And then, of course, the hysterical family members came out of the hospital room, and tried to tell everyone else who was waiting the terrible news. But judging by their expressions when they appeared, the people who were anxiously awaiting some shred of good news began bawling their eyes out.

So he and Neku left the hospital, booked a hotel room for the night, and decided to catch a flight back to Chicago in the morning.

The hotel was decent. It was clean, though the furniture, aside from the beds, was all rather old and in need of replacement. The bathroom, thankfully, was fairly new and sparkling white, but the view from their window was horrid. Hello construction. Normally, one wouldn't quite think the view from one's hotel window was ranked up there on the list of 'Is This Hotel Decent Or Not', but as an avid and true appreciator of beauty, especially natural beauty, Marluxia would have preferred a dumpier room with something prettier to look at out the window.

Neku had been rather quiet since his initial pissiness at having their mark die had worn off. Marluxia wouldn't have thought it was anything out of the ordinary if he hadn't found Neku's blue headphones lying on the bathroom floor, forgotten, after Neku had taken a shower.

Now, Marluxia wasn't particularly close with anyone in Sunrise. He got on with Luxord rather well, and quite enjoyed the long, intelligent conversations he had every once in a while with Vincent, but other than that, he stayed detached. However, even he knew that Neku, who he'd barely said anything to at all to since the boy had been admitted to their ranks, cherished his headphones and iPod like they were his own child. They were his coveted treasures, and the fact that he'd randomly left one where it could possibly get broken pretty much told Marluxia quite clearly that something was wrong.

He didn't press anything when he returned Neku's headphones to him, but apparently there was something about spilling all your woes to someone who was practically a stranger (pushing aside the fact you lived with them) that had Neku babbling on for nearly a half an hour about how Demyx's death made him think about some pretty frightening things. Nothing out of the ordinary there, either. Marluxia listened, for the most part, just to be polite. Neku just honestly needed someone to talk to. He, like Marluxia, didn't do a whole lot of that. Part of him was rather interested on hearing how Neku had took the death of their comrade, but the other part of him was still rather irritated from flying all the way out to Montana for nothing. (Not, he noted, that he'd wasted any of his own money on the venture, as the plane tickets and money for return trips were provided by Galileo.)

What really caught his attention, though, came at the end of all of Neku's emo whining.

Now _that_ was interesting.

Neku had a deliciously dirty little secret, and Marluxia was the only one that knew it. Of course, Neku hadn't meant to tell him and had made him swear a vow of secrecy. But Marluxia still knew. And if Marluxia had to have one defining vice, it would be his absolute love of gossip.

That, or his willingness to do nothing at all and watch everything unfold from the sidelines if it so pleased him.

He didn't really spread any rumours or what not, but he was still addicted to being in the know, no matter how trivial or false the bit of information was. After all, gossip was gossip and had a tendency of being table-ready lies. But perhaps the second was a far darker quirk for him to have. Marluxia wasn't quite sure whether or not he'd have helped the kid who'd gotten hit by the train, because a large part of him would have wanted to see how long he'd survive past impact.

He'd been called cruel in the past, but he didn't see it as cruelty. The thirst for knowledge, however macabre or bizarre, was never cruel to him. He could attribute that thought process to the teachings of his old mentor.

In any case, the trip back home had been fairly silent between the two of them. Neku was still lost in his pondering mode, and Marluxia had taken the time to entertain himself with different scenarios in his head, all of which being possible outcomes of what would happen if he were to slip and tell the rest of Sunrise just what Neku's secret was.

Luxord would be terribly offended, of course. It probably had something to do with his whole military background. Xigbar would snicker and make snide comments. Kairi would be worried, and Yuffie, amused. Albel would avoid the subject, Riku would have no voiced or known opinion, and Vincent wouldn't say much on the matter, though he wouldn't approve. Axel and Sora, sympathetic and empathetic respectively, would try to comfort him as best they could.

It was a hazardous secret Neku kept, not only to himself but to them all.

"Well... We're back," Neku said dully as they approached Station 516, his eyes barely leaving the scummy sidewalk. Marluxia sighed and looked up at the balcony. His flowers weren't dead. He'd only been gone a day or so, but he didn't know what to think about them leaving Paine in charge of the house while they were out. She might have watered them and taken care of them like he'd asked her, or she might not have. If they weren't on their regular watering schedule, they became hard to work with. But they were as bright and perky as ever, and looked a bit wet, so perhaps she _had_ watered them.

"Yeah," Marluxia replied distantly, continuing to gaze up at his precious plants. Yes, everything seemed to be in order.

"You... You think Kairi will be angry with us for coming back early?" Neku asked a bit hesitantly, scratching the back of his orange-haired head. Marluxia shook his own.

"No, I don't think so. It's not like _we_ offed him, right? But we should probably text her and tell her what happened, though."

Neku nodded and Marluxia turned the worn brass doorknob and pushed the scuffed, off-white door to the station open wide.

"And we should also probably--"

"Do you hear that?" Neku asked in a low voice, nudging Marluxia and frowning as he gazed around the entrance hall. Marluxia paused to listen.

"That's just Paine, she's house-sitting, remember?" Marluxia reminded him, dropping his duffle bag off on his left as Neku walked around him on his right.

"No, it's... More than one person," Neku frowned, setting his own bag down gently and tiptoeing down the rest of the entrance hall, looking at the entryway to the den.

"Sure it's not the TV? It's up really loud," Marluxia shrugged. Neku shook his head.

"No, seriously, just... listen," he said, in a whisper barely audible over the blaring television. Marluxia stopped and listened again. After a moment, he frowned. Neku was right. It wasn't just Paine's voice. Yet they were all familiar to him, somehow. He caught up with Neku silently. Why they were being silent, he hadn't the foggiest, but he was curious, and generally when you sneak up on someone, there's a greater chance you'll see them than if you make a lot of noise.

When they finally rounded the corner, they stopped abruptly and stared, dumbfounded.

Paine had jumped up immediately, her entire being projecting the reaction of someone who was caught completely off-guard with their pants down. But Paine wasn't the reason for their gaping. It was, rather, her guests: Rikku, lounging in Luxord's favourite red armchair, and Yuna, clinging to herself and wrapped in a blanket on the couch opposite her. All three women had frozen in their tracks, and Yuna and Rikku were giving Marluxia and Neku rather pendulous looks. There was a long, tensioned silence before anyone spoke.

"What are you guys doing back here?" Paine demanded, taking a fearless step forward. She was obviously trying to divert their attention away from the refugees. It wasn't working. Suddenly, Neku cursed.

It happened in the space of five long seconds. Neku's hand shot into his pocket and withdrew his cell phone; Yuna and Rikku jumped to their feet and scrambled away from the men and in the direction the TV set in alarm, and Paine, snarling, made a violent move toward Neku, her eyes fixated on the phone. But Marluxia was closer. Coming to an immediate decision, Marluxia grasped the back of Neku's jacket, pulled him closer with one hand, and used the other to wrench the phone out of his grasp. He chucked the phone across the room; it hit an end table, causing a small picture to topple off balance and fall to the floor, the glass of the frame shattering on impact. He immediately wrapped his now-free arm around Neku tightly and hugged him to his own body, locking the boy's arms down. Marluxia's other hand darted up to cover his mouth. Paine stopped mid-lunge, outrightly bewildered by Marluxia's actions.

Neku, though stunned at first, was now struggling to break free of Marluxia's grasp as the pink-haired man and Paine stared at each other. Paine bore an expression of deep, distrustful confusion, and Marluxia, one that someone might don while in intense thought. In Marluxia's case, his speculations were reflecting his face. What-ifs and possibilities were flooding his mind, and while they weren't there long enough for him to really consider them as much as he was able, there was, without a doubt, one overriding connection between them.

They were interesting. And that was all Marluxia needed.

Suddenly, pain erupted in his hand and he yanked it away from Neku's mouth as quickly as he could. The little bastard had bit him!

"Let me go!" Neku growled, jerking around and trying to get away again. "We need to call Kairi!"

Marluxia scowled at him and tried to shake off the pain while tightening his grip. He might not have been as muscular or sturdily built as a situation like this might have called for, but he was still a good deal bigger than Neku was, in both height and frame, and he hoped that would make up for him. Still, despite the slim boy's size, Neku was putting up a better fight than Marluxia had thought.

Once the sting of the bite had worn off, Marluxia slapped it back over Neku's mouth and gripped his jaw firmly, making sure he wouldn't be able to bite him again. He bent his head over close to the boy's ear.

"You make any move to tell anyone about this," Marluxia whispered dangerously, keeping his eyes fixed on Paine, "I will tell _everyone _your little secret."

Neku's escape efforts almost completely halted. He kept repeating a muffled 'no' over and over while shaking his head, and his attempts had dropped down to a pathetic, halfhearted level that a spaghetti noodle might exhibit if it was given free mobility. Marluxia glanced at Yuna and Rikku, who were eyeing him as equally suspiciously as Paine had been previously, and then returned his attention to the greyish-haired woman in front of him.

"Get out of here."

They didn't need to be told twice.

Yuna, moving a bit awkwardly as though injured, and Rikku, nearly tripping over an armchair in the process, scrambled around the den and collected their small assortment of belongings. Paine helped them, though she didn't bother giving the objects to their correct owner. She just shoved them in the pockets or the small backpacks of whoever was nearest. Within moments, they were all packed up (there wasn't much to collect, though Paine had secretly slipped them some of the fruit for the road), and were making a dash for the door. Yuna paused and gave a slight bow to Marluxia as she passed, but kept her head down as she followed Rikku down the hall and out the door. Predictably, Paine stopped in front of Marluxia on her own way out.

"What the hell are you thinking?" she asked in an incredulous growl, her teeth gritted together. Marluxia didn't answer.

"Paine! Come on!" Rikku called anxiously from the doorway. Paine gave him one last bewildered look before turning to jog down the entrance hallway, giving him glances over her shoulder until she exited and shut the door behind her.

Neku wrenched himself away from Marluxia the moment he heard the door close. He backed away from him, creating a moderate distance between the two. He was being wary now, it seemed. Neku gave a loud 'tch'.

"What the... what the hell?" Neku breathed, sending him a what-the-fuck-you-idiot kind of look. "We can't... There's no way we can keep this a secret!"

"And that's where you're wrong," Marluxia replied disdainfully, looking at the remains of breakfast that was scattered about the den. Oh, lovely. He knew right away who would be cleaning that up.

"No, I mean we literally _can't_ keep our mouths shut about this!" Neku protested. "That damn bond thing... It won't _let_ us keep a secret from him!"

"And yours?" Marluxia raised an eyebrow and brushed himself off a little. Neku looked away, his cheeks reddening somewhat.

"That's different," Neku grumbled, scratching the back of his neck. Marluxia shook his head.

"I don't see how. They're both issues that could be a danger to not only us, but Galileo as well. And if he knew about it, he would have remedied it already."

Marluxia watched Neku as the boy fidgeted in thought, his back turned to the older male.

"You wouldn't really tell them though...?" Neku asked, something resembling hope apparent in his tone. "That was just a bluff, right?"

"No, it wasn't," Marluxia replied bluntly, crossing his arms and snorting in mock amusement. "You mention they were here, or that you know where they are, or that Paine knows, or anything that could possibly get them found out, and I will personally tell the rest of Sunrise that-- What, don't want to hear it?" Marluxia smirked. Neku had covered his ears with his hands and had his eyes shut tight.

"Just stop! I won't... I won't say anything, damnit!"

Marluxia smiled at him briefly, then looked back out at the food mess. Suddenly, he had an idea.

"... Also, go clean up the den. If you want your secret to be kept safe, that is," Marluxia snickered. Neku turned around and glared at him.

"Don't be a jackass," he warned. Interesting. He didn't seem threatened by _that_ statement. Still, he had a valid point. Exploiting it to that extent could rightfully earn him the title of jackass (or douchebag, bastard, or other such names), and as petty as being called a name was, he'd still prefer to avoid it.

"Fair enough. But you're helping," Marluxia decided, stretching and walking into the dark red-themed room. Neku grunted in reply and shoved his hands in his pockets, but started walking the other way.

"Bathroom first," he muttered, pointing up the staircase he was about to ascend. Marluxia made a noise of acknowledgment and walked around the den, considering where to start first when he noticed Neku's phone and the broken picture frame lying on the ground. He walked over and picked up the photo gingerly, being mindful of the pieces of glass lying about. He flipped it over, looked at it, and let out a chuckle.

Oh, the irony.

* * *

**A/N: I deeply apologize for the long wait. I was stuck in a rut, and then I was in the hospital (no worries, I'm fine, it was a false alarm), and then school started. But all the while, this was weighing heavily on my mind.**

**And it's been completely written for a month.**

**I apologize for that too. When Ed had beta'd it, she said she'd done a TON of work on it, which made me panic and feel completely and totally ashamed that I hadn't been up to par with my usual standard.**

**In a way, I guess you could say I was afraid of what she might have said, because writing is one of the only things on the planet I'm sensitive about. So I kind of ignored her edited bit until tonight, whereupon I revised and submitted it.**

**Another thing you might notice is... Marluxia is different than many interpretations make him. I personally don't think he was gay in the game at all. I think he was a creeper who molested Naminé routinely. But seeing something different usually makes for a refreshing change, which is something I had hoped to bring to the table. You might think he's being OOC, but OOC-ness is relative, especially when relationships with others come into play. Don't worry. I have a why for everything. **

**Also, you might have noticed the writing style take a sharp turn when it was from his point of view; that is him speaking. Some of the characters will have similar inner voices-- and others will be something else entirely. I haven't been able to finalize some of them yet, which is cause for it being perhaps a bit too similar, but starting very soon I hope to give a recognizable voice to each of them to the point where you wouldn't have to have it told to you to know whose point of view it's coming from.**

**Also, this chapter is a lot shorter than the last ones and coupled with an overly long Author's Notes section. I would have added another section, but the lovely Ed told me flat out that what I had in mind would deter from the impact I was trying to leave with chapter three. But you can rest assured that there will be a fairly amusing conversation (in my opinion) between Axel and Riku in the next chapter.**

**The last thing I apologize for is this: I still haven't told you damn near anything. I'm cursing myself. And here I was worried I wasn't fit enough for long-term storytelling.**

**In any case, I appreciate you taking the time to read this, and any comments or constructive criticism/critique are welcomed. Groundless flames, however, aren't. They make me a sad Paradox. :C**

**Ed's Character Tally for Fangirl Moments**

**Marluxia : 70 points for being fucking win**

**Riku: 50 for existing**

**Roxas: 25 for being a retard + emotional breakdown**

**Demyx: 20 for being sexy and mysterious**

**Axel: -5 for just being fail**

"**Back in my day, we didn't have fanfiction. We had rocks."**

**-PxC**

EDIT: Godfuckingdamn, I always forget to delete at least ONE section of Ed's beta notes. /kills things


	4. Power

**Chapter Four**

**Power**

"... Well, then, Roxas," Kairi said, planting a cheerful, relieved smile on her face. "I am Kairi Estevan, leader of Sunrise."

They were on an empty veranda that was part of the hotel. There were several tables and chairs with umbrellas scattered about, and they had a nice view of the garden-surrounded pool two floors below. It was a sunny day, for the most part, but thanks to the time of year, it wasn't as hot as it could have been. Both were comfortable in the outside air.

Roxas half glared at her, trying to determine whether or not they were all just psycho-rapists waiting to take advantage of minors. He knew Sora was an adult, and while he didn't have the most unchildlike features, judging by the looks of the other three he'd seen that morning-- that bastard Axel, this chick, and the dude with the white hair-- they were probably older.

In any case, after his breakdown earlier that day, the events that transpired happened in quick succession. Axel had wandered out to get them McDonald's for breakfast. He returned, and they ate their McGriddles in silence. Sora had, after nearly an hour of searching, found the remote control for the television and had turned it to a national news station. Roxas hadn't been paying too much attention to it, but from what he gathered, there had been some crisis on the eastern coast involving ships and cargo. Not too long afterward, the chick he was sitting with, Kairi, and a tall, muscular, pretty-faced boy with white hair had barged in, and had somehow convinced Roxas to accompany the girl out to where they now sat to have a chat about 'what he was'.

Apparently, he was some sort of 'July', whatever the hell that meant, but he assumed that from the nature of this meeting, he was about to find out. Still, that didn't keep him from being skeptical.

"Name's Roxas Allister. So... What the hell are we here for?" he asked somewhat impatiently, slumping forward in his seat and resting his head on his hands, his elbows propped on the glass table. It wasn't polite, but he was in no mood to observe pleasantries. He was both ashamed and embarrassed of his earlier display, and somehow, he got the feeling this woman knew what happened. Kairi sighed in a 'let's get down to business' way and crossed her legs neatly.

"Well, Roxas, it's nice to meet you. I've heard so many wonderful things about you from your brother, and--"

"No you haven't," Roxas interjected, staring at her with bitter eyes. If anything, Sora was mortified to have Roxas as a brother. He doubted whether the brunette had ever even mentioned him in passing ever since he ran off. Kairi frowned a little, quite obviously at a loss for what to say to that, but she glossed over it a bit awkwardly.

"Erm-- well, anyway, Roxas," she continued hurriedly, keeping her smile on her face and her tone light and friendly, "We've recently lost a member of our group. We were obligated to perform a search to locate the replacement, and our search has led us to you."

Roxas scoffed.

"And tell me why you couldn't just question the people in your own damn city to join this little club of yours?" he demanded, wrinkling his nose a little. Kairi's patient gaze met Roxas' aggressive one dead on.

"Because that's not how it works. We can't choose who picks up the slack another left off."

Roxas raised an eyebrow.

"And why is that?" he asked, trying to keep the laugh out of his voice. Kairi seemed to sense Roxas wasn't believing her.

"... You know, Roxas, this thing could go over a lot more smoothly if you'd take me seriously," she chided gently, brushing her hair behind her ear. "I'm sure this is hard for you, but please understand we're not here to hurt you in any way."

Roxas smirked out loud, then brought his leg up and placed his feet on the table, making sure Kairi got a good view of his burn. "_Really,_ now?"

Kairi frowned in concern as she stared at it.

"How did you--?"

"That guy, Axel," Roxas laughed dourly. "He did it."

Kairi's temper flared. Her expression became stony.

"Well, you can rest assured that I will personally deal with him when we're through here." She dug out her phone, flicked it open and began to send an angry text message, but stopped midway through, sighed, and pocketed it again.

"Forgive me, where are my manners? It's rude to text in the middle of a face-to-face conversation. Anyway, Roxas, I'm truly sorry for what Axel has done to you, but our goal isn't to harm you."

She seemed sincere enough, Roxas noted, though one person really couldn't speak for everyone, even if they were the leader of their faction. They couldn't control all the actions of their subordinates. That bastard Axel had been a prime example. From what Roxas was told, the injury had been an accident, but he'd be damned if he didn't believe the redhead was out to get him, so anything that got him into trouble with his superior was okay by him. He nodded, and Kairi smiled, looking as though a weight was lifted from her shoulders.

"Good, I was hoping you'd understand. Now, then... Have Sora and Axel told you anything about Sunrise?" she asked politely. Roxas shook his head.

"No. They were probably waiting for you to do it," Roxas shrugged, deciding that if she was making an effort to be polite, then he might as well, too. He sat back in his hair and straightened his posture. Kairi nodded.

"Well, then... Where to start?" she laughed lightly, pushing her hair behind her ear again; it had a bad habit of slipping loose. "Sunrise is an organization that responds directly to a man-- or woman, really, nobody's met this person-- named Galileo. But since historically, Galileo was a man, we just refer to him as a male for convenience. He gives us things to do, by way of his special Couriers, and we do them. Sometimes the things he makes us do are illegal and high-risk. Other times, they're mundane and make absolutely no sense at all. But we need to do anything and everything he tells us to."

"But that's like... slavery!" Roxas protested, banging his fist on the tabletop. "He can't force you to do anything at all! Just quit if you don't like it!"

"But... See, it's not that simple," Kairi replied with a slightly pained smile. "We're bound to serve him in any manner he chooses. Considering that, I think he's being more lenient than he could be."

"How are you bound to serve him? That sounds like a load of shit."

"Old magic," Kairi replied, once more placing her hair behind her ear. "But-- it's not quite magic, I suppose. More like a bond of sorts. A deep bond that runs soul-deep."

Roxas' inner skeptic was coming out again. Right. Magic. How could he not have known?

"Oh _yeah_, that's _right,_" Roxas replied sarcastically, "_Magic. _Oh, you should give me a look at the dragons and winged horses you flew over on from Chicago, I haven't seen one in _ages._"

"Roxas," Kairi scolded gingerly, her expression slightly hurt. "Please."

Roxas sighed and rolled his eyes, but waved a hand at her.

"Fine, fine. Go."

Kairi regarded Roxas with a scrutinizing stare, but she continued on after a few moments.

"Galileo has six "main" underlings. Like I've told you, he has four Couriers, who have been given the titles Spring, Summer, Autumn, and Winter. But aside from them, he also has two people who are representatives of himself; if an issue arises where he needs to be present, Galileo sends one of them in his stead, as opposed to relying on his Couriers carrying the messages to and from constantly. Galileo does not place calls, but he has provided each of us with a phone. And despite the occasional text message I get straight from Galileo himself when there is something important that must reach us immediately, he does not make use of a phone in any other way."

"So what are you, his lackeys?" Roxas asked, his curiosity piquing and his minor cruelties being cast aside. Even if it was the work of some loony who was out on a practical joke, it was interesting. Kairi tilted her head, and her eyes looked toward the sky as she thought.

"No... Not quite. While we do what he requires us to do, we're more like his employees. After all, he does send us money for whatever amenities we need, and pays for our travel expenses should we need to catch a plane."

"Mysterious benefactor, eh? Must be nice," Roxas replied, his tone lightly laced with jealousy. If he really paid for all their needs, then that guy-- Galileo-- might even pay their college tuition. His family had never been particularly well-off. Like most families, his was what could be considered lower middle-class. And especially since he'd moved in with his grandmother, money had been tight. He'd gotten two part-time jobs on top of striving for the best possible grades he could in school (which normally hovered in the B range), because going to college was the cure-all for him. If he went to college, he could get a good job. If he got a good job, he would get paid well. If he got paid well, Roxas could help his mother-- he was looking to get into law school, and not only would he be able to support her financially, he'd know the laws surrounding abuse and be able to take his sick fuck of a stepfather to court. But as for where he was going... Well, he wasn't sure. He knew he'd never be able to get past the admissions office at Harvard, his dream school; his grades wouldn't permit it, nor did he have the money for a dorm. He'd have to move out there, too-- which would also cost more money. But hell, he'd be able to stomach a few preppy snobs and the whole Ivy League bullshit if he got into a place like that. Top-class education. But it was just a fleeting fancy. No, the only option Roxas really had was going somewhere nearby, to one of the more local colleges in the hopes of getting a law degree. But if... Maybe...

"Well, remember, we _do_ need to work for him," Kairi chuckled quietly. "May I continue?"

Roxas nodded. The money portion had caught his rapt attention. She said he was one of them too, right? Well... They might be crazy, but... If there was a guy who really paid for everything...

"In any case, the twelve members of Sunrise are, like his Couriers, named after times of the year-- We were given the names of the months. I am January. Sora is April, and Axel is November. Riku, the white-haired man I brought along with me, is September. Each of us was born on the first day of the month we're named after, and each of us... Have certain abilities gifted to us many decades ago by Galileo."

"But wait, you're only like... twenty," Roxas replied confusedly, not seeing how that was possible. Maybe Kairi they'd all just undergone _extreme_ plastic surgery? But that couldn't be right, he _knew _Sora wasn't that old, so...?

"Twenty-two," Kairi corrected politely. "And... I don't know how it works, but... Once one of our number dies, the abilities and responsibilities-- and the bond-- is transferred to the most fitting candidate. And it so happens that when Demyx, our previous July, died, his abilities shifted to you. In a sense."

"Wh-what?" Roxas asked, not quite understanding that. It made no sense-- things like that did just not happen normally. "What the hell? That's... You said... Magic doesn't exist!"

"It's not magic, Roxas. But I don't know what else it could be." Kairi sighed and closed her eyes, rubbing her temples. After a moment in which Roxas had gawked at her passed, she looked up again. "Tell me, Roxas... Have you been feeling... _Different_, lately?"

Roxas opened his mouth and was about to respond with a vehement "no", but he caught himself before he made a sound. She-- that was right. He had been feeling different lately. His already short fuse had gotten even shorter. It made him nervous, but he had pegged it down to the stress of his upcoming senior year.

"Just... Some anger issues, all right? Not a big deal, I'm a big boy and I can handle them. It's nothing like what you're saying."

A blatant lie. Roxas had been terrified of what he'd done to Sora earlier that day, and now he was _sure_ this woman knew all about it. That bastard Axel had been glued to texting until she'd arrived. He'd no doubt been in contact with her... And had probably given her a skewed version of the events that had transpired. After all, Roxas had kicked him in the head, and the guy probably held a grudge because of it.

...Actually, the grudge was probably multiple things, as that bastard Axel hadn't seemed terribly pleased with him when he'd woken up.

That bastard Axel. That Bastard Axel?

Roxas made a mental note to capitalize That and Bastard and make it a permanent nickname from now on.

"Anger issues? Roxas, the... The abilities could be anything. Even though the... powers... are being passed on, they adapt themselves to the core of the person who possesses them. And if you'd already had anger issues before, then maybe--"

Roxas stood up abruptly, causing Kairi to lean back in alarm. Who the hell did that bitch think she think she was?

"Look, bitch," Roxas spat, his eyes growing dark as he tried his best to be intimidating, "I didn't have any fucking anger problems before, and you know what? They're pretty nonexistent now. So I'd choose your words more carefully if I were you."

Kairi stared at him in shock for nearly thirty seconds before she recovered, her demeanor apologetic.

"No, no, please don't misunderstand," she said hurriedly, waving her hands as if to exemplify her words, "I wasn't trying to offend you, I was just trying to unearth possibilities of what your own skill might be. Please sit back down."

Her words, while courteous, were a firm order despite the pretense of a request. Somewhat reluctantly, Roxas sat back down, folding his arms and brooding over it. He knew his temper had flared again. He couldn't help it. He couldn't brush off Kairi's comments, or think of them as meaning well. It wasn't an option for him in that moment.

A shiver ran down his spine.

"Thank you," Kairi nodded genuinely, giving a small cough. She smoothed her clothes and hair, the latter of which seemed to be habit. "Back to what we were discussing before... Yes. Roxas, in some way shape or form, the moment the spirit of July flooded into you, you became a different person."

"I'm still me," Roxas grumped, avoiding catching Kairi's gaze. "That's never gonna change."

As Roxas stared off in another direction, Kairi chuckled silently, knowing it was her turn to wait for a response. Several minutes of silence passed before Roxas said anything.

"So... If everyone has these power things... What do you have?" he asked, trying to mask the curiosity in his voice as he looked at her out of the corner of his eye. Kairi smiled warmly.

"As the head of the group, my core has adapted to control two different abilities. The first and foremost is the curious ability to lead."

"But that's not really an "ability", is it? I mean some people are born leaders, others aren't," Roxas frowned. He looked up at Kairi. Her expression told him there was more to the story, and it was less than pleasant.

"... I suppose. But it's a bit more manifested than that," she replied evasively, shifting uncomfortably. The need to know how exactly it manifested itself gnawed at him.

"And how does it do that?"

Kairi sighed. "Are you sure you can handle it Roxas? It...might not be what you want to hear."

"I can take it," he growled, fists clenching. Being treated like a kid wasn't on his happy list. Kairi looked down, and

fidgeted with one of the buttons on her jacket.

"... If I willed it enough, people would follow my orders without question,"she began. Shame rang clear in her voice. "I could make them want to take bullets, run into suicide missions with a false sense of hope in their chests, organize a massacre of a religious group, or even make them want to die to save my life."

The words hit Roxas with the impact of a train hurtling 200 MPH down a rusty railway. He had no clue how, but-- She was right. Absolutely right. He knew. He didn't know how, but he did. It was a terrifying prospect. But...

"But," she added, a bit frantic, "I would never-- _could_ never-- do something of that sort. It's inconceivable for me to manipulate people in that way, just because I could. People in general should never do things just because they can. It's... A fickle thrill that quickly escalates to greater offenses. In terms of the law, things that were once too minor to be looked into morph into misdemeanors... And misdemeanors into felonies. It's how wars start, how oppression begins, how people are slaughtered. In other words, it's the abuse of power."

Roxas was silent. Power wasn't only political, and power wasn't only green and stamped with pictures of old dead white guys. Power could be physical, too. The men his mother attracted had all had power complexes. They'd exercise their physical brutality on his poor mother day in and day out, and started on his brother-- and Roxas, slimy, lowly Roxas, had done shit to prevent it. He felt small. Lower than he possibly had ever felt.

"And the other power?" he asked shrewdly, his voice markedly duller than before. Kairi gave an audible laugh.

"Observant, aren't you?" she grinned, looking—proud?--and folding her hands neatly in her lap. Roxas eyed her expectantly.

"Well?"

"Before I gained the leadership qualities, I knew only the gift of the Healer."

Not for the first time during their encounter, Roxas stared at her, trying to make sense of it. Finally deciding upon a course of action, he lifted his injured leg up onto the table.

"Oh yeah?" he asked skeptically, "Prove it."

It was unexpected; Kairi's eyes grew round. Roxas wrinkled his nose a little. If she could fix the burn, then he'd believe her. She'd believe in this man named Galileo, and that these people were bound to serve him. If she wasn't lying here, she wasn't lying the rest of the way, right? And that meant... He could possibly get that free college tuition. He still had a year of high school left, but... Maybe he could test out, and just go right into studying law.

Kairi stood up, shed her lightweight purple jacket and delicately unwrapped the dressing on Roxas' leg. The boy winced as his wound was jostled, but it was quickly exposed to the air, nastily pus-filled and bright red. She winced.

"And you said_ Axel _did this?" she asked incredulously, hissing inward in sympathy. Roxas grunted in reply.

"That he did."

Kairi clicked her tongue and shook her head, and let her fingers delicately trace over the injury. Roxas shivered at the odd combination of itchiness and pain, but kept his leg still. Kairi's hands slowly began to press harder and harder, and Roxas soon needed to grit his teeth in order to keep the pain back. After the pain had reached its highest peak, Kairi removed her hands. Roxas looked down; awe filled him as he saw with his own eyes that the wound had disappeared from his flesh. He placed his own hands over where the burn had been. No pain... and only a very light scar. He looked back up at the auburn-haired woman beside him, his mouth hanging open.

That was that. He was sold. Completely, and utterly sold.

"But there's something else of grave importance you should know, Roxas. It might be wise to sit down," she said politely as she retreated back to her own seat. Roxas fell sloppily back onto his, still massaging his leg in wonder.

"Yeah? What is it?"

"You are Connected."

Roxas nodded, his attention still on the absence of a burn. When what she said finally registered in his head, he looked up, his face contorted in confusion.

"Wait, what?"

"Sunrise isn't the only group that works for Galileo. There's another. They go by the name of Sunset, and operate out of Beijing, China. For every one of us, there is one of them, ready to match. They are our rivals, our friends, and our equals. Like the sunrise and sunset of the actual world, one cannot exist without the other."

That was... confusing. And rather vague.

"What does that mean?"

"Sunset consists of another set of people that function under the names of the twelve months. But they are not separate entities apart from us. Naminé, the January of Sunset, is me, as I am her. Together we are January... not alone. When she feels joy, I do. When I'm in pain, she is. After time, you begin to develop a resistance to each other's moods. But if either of us dies..."

Kairi didn't need to finish her statement. Roxas was horrified by the thought. To... To have someone capable of ending your life like that at the drop of a hat...

"W-wait, _I _don't have one, do I?" he asked nervously, his heart pounding an erratic rhythm against his chest. If he did... He hoped to god he didn't have one of those ungodly annoying emo kids whose only thoughts were of how bad their life sucked-- the kind who cut themselves and thought about, or attempted, suicide. Shit. There were so many of them nowadays--!

"Everyone does. Yours, however... I don't believe has been located yet. I'd have gotten word from Leon if Sunset had found your Connected." She smiled lightly. "Leon leads Sunset," she added at seeing Roxas' questioning look at the mention of the name.

"But... But what if... Y'know... He's like... " Roxas mimicked the slashing of his throat with his finger anxiously. She stared at him for a moment, not quite getting what he meant, but when Roxas started making slashing movements across the underside of his wrist, Kairi seemed to grasp what he meant and scratched her head.

"Well... I don't think we've had any suicidal members in the course of our history before, but... I don't think they'd physically be able to carry through with it. I'd have to ask Galileo about it. He might not give me an answer though," Kairi shrugged, looking slightly frustrated by that. "It's how he is. He hates revealing secrets. He already thinks we know too much."

"But everything you've told me sounds like things you've found out on your own?" Roxas replied, slightly relieved by what she'd said, though a looming "what if" hovered over him. "How can he be angry at you for that?"

"Galileo, in the past, has tended to underestimate the intelligence of his employees. Especially the observational skills of the oldest surviving ones-- Vincent, one of our number, and his Connected. After two decades of the same old thing, you tend to pick up things most people don't notice. Unfortunately, neither Vincent nor his partner are sociable. If Vincent knows any more about Galileo than I, he hasn't mentioned anything. If it were important, though, I think he'd tell me. Despite his reclusive nature, he's not a man who could stand to sit by and let bad things happen."

Roxas grunted and scratched his head. This Galileo guy sounded like a prick. His gaze stuck on a random twig by his feet, he shifted his weight around on the chair. He was trying to internally resign himself and justify going with these people, even if it was for materialistic reasons. It wasn't working well. He could already feel his freedom and individuality slipping away. He was going to have a leash slapped around his neck, his voice box removed, and his fangs and claws sharpened. The Dog of a man who sounded like a bigger jerk than That Bastard Axel.

Lovely.

Kairi checked her thin wrist watch, then cleared her throat politely, starting to get up.

"If you'll excuse me, Roxas, I need to rendezvous with Sunset and inform them we've found you."

"Well-- how can you be _sure_ you've got the right guy?" Roxas piped up helplessly, his head snapping in her direction. "Like... How do you know for _sure?"_

Kairi smiled, walked around the table and rumpled up Roxas' hair in a sisterly manner.

"I can feel it," she assured him. She placed her hand over her heart. "Right here. The spirit of January knows the spirit of July all too well. They--" She looked as though she were about to say more, but shook her head. Roxas was curious about what she'd stopped herself from saying, but he didn't press for more.

"Um," Roxas muttered sheepishly, looking away again and fidgeting with the zipper on his pants leg, "You mentioned, um... Special power things, yeah? Um... I was wondering..."

"What Sora's is?" Kairi finished perceptively. Roxas bit his lip and nodded, only half sure he wanted to know the answer. "Well," she continued, "I think that's something you'll have to ask him yourself. But for now," she grew louder near the end as Roxas started to protest, "I really must go. You should stay here and sit and contemplate this. It's a lot to swallow, and I'm still not sure if you believe me on it. Just know that I have absolutely no reason to lie to you."

Kairi readjusted and smoothed her clothing, picked up her black briefcase and headed for the doors back into the hotel. To where after, however, Roxas wasn't sure. The word 'rendezvous' generally meant meeting up with people in person-- and hadn't she just said that Sunset was based in China? China... Sunset... That's right. There was someone Connected to him. Could he feel it? He wasn't sure. Emotional connections, he knew; he'd had a couple girlfriends he'd become attached to (Olette had been one once, although it was a short stint), and there was definitely his mother... His relationship with Sora... He knew what those were on the spot. But he had an inkling that this 'Connection', this bond, was something different entirely. Another shiver ran down his spine, and he was immensely intrigued.

"Oh... And Roxas?" Kairi called back from halfway through the door. Roxas looked up at her.

"Yeah?"

"You'd do best to remember what I spoke of power. Because now, you have some."

* * *

Rain again. Axel was beginning to think that Chicago might as well be renamed "The Rainy City" instead of "The Windy City." Regardless, he'd needed to get out of 516 something fierce-- a desire he'd shared with Riku. The two had somehow come to a nonverbal agreement that they'd be traveling together as they exited the building and hopped a bus in the direction of Chinatown. By that point, the rain had faded into a slight drizzle, and there were afew vendors still lined up at their stalls down the main street. Of those that still remained was Axel's favourite snack place. After snagging some odango, the pair walked at a leisurely pace down the middle of a back alley, umbrellas down, enjoying the cool, wet air and not caring in the slightest that they'd be soaked through to the bone in not too long a time.

"Three months, yeah?" Riku commented idly as his aqua-coloured eyes flicked up to the opaque brick of grey sky. Axel grunted and nodded his head slightly in reply. While there was no other context, the subtext was all too clear. Their venture today was a habit they shared. Neither of them were particularly close to the other, nor did they hang out often. But between them there was a mutual bond, one built off of their similarities. The physical: they were tall and had long hair, thin noses and high cheekbones. Strong shoulders and bright eyes. And then there were the personal: both were intense human beings, grief and drama aside. Both had ulterior motives to almost any situation, and while they were both shamefully self-concerned, there was always that one person in the back of their minds they would take the fall for.

Well. The last HAD been a similarity, anyway. Now... not so much, Axel noted, for obvious reasons.

But it had been three months since their last excursion into Chinatown, trips only made when something was making them uneasy. It wasn't always the same thing, but the two had a knack for picking up on each other's moods.

"So what happened down there?" Riku continued after a moment, glancing at Axel before shoving his hands in his baggy pants pockets. Axel ran a hand through his mess of hair tiredly.

"... A whole lot of shit, man," Axel sighed, a bit reluctant to go through it. "Didn't Kairi tell you?"

"Not a word," Riku said almost bitterly, turning to spit at the ground. "She never tells me anything, you know."

Axel frowned, rather surprised at this.

"Really? But you're always with her, I thought--"

"Not out of choice," Riku corrected him dully. "She likes keeping me close for some odd reason or another but she never really says anything... Personal. Nothing terribly revealing. I think she thinks of me like a dog, really. Nice to have around, maybe sometimes as a safety measure, but not quite intelligent enough to understand what she's thinking."

"Oh come on," Axel waved a hand as if to dismiss the notion, "Kairi's totally not like that, man. She's probably just worried about you or something... Sometimes she just doesn't say anything."

Riku shrugged. "You still haven't told me what went down."

"Oh, right. That new kid was a goddamn fucking headache," Axel replied, careful to stress his favourite word. "I even needed to use the stun gun on his sorry ass."

"Oh, so that's what he was freaking out about when we walked in," Riku mused. Axel scowled. No, it hadn't been completely what Roxas was freaking out about, but it was close enough. When Kairi and Riku had arrived, Roxas and Axel had been in the midst of another argument over abuse, possible rape and kidnappers. Sora, too exhausted to do much, just kept out of the way and watched to make sure things didn't get out of hand. Regardless, when Kairi and Riku had entered, the two had nearly been at each other's throats, and Riku had made an immediate dive to pry Axel away while Sora and Kairi grabbed Roxas.

"Kid can't be all bad," Riku added after several moments of silence. Axel wrinkled his nose. Ever the optimist, Riku. Sarcasm intended.

"... He was RUBBING all over me," Axel grumped, a chill running through his body at the memory. "I don't LIKE it when people rub me."

"... What?" Riku replied, stopping in his tracks and staring at Axel as though the redhead were spouting crackpot theories about sasquatch.

"The damn fucking kid was TRIPPING when we found him, he's some kind of druggie... Raver... Thing. But he was RUBBING. AGAINST. ME. Do you have any IDEA what that feels like?" Axel demanded, sticking out his tongue and shuddering before grabbing Riku by the sleeves of his coat and shaking him a little for effect. "Any at all?!"

Riku grinned wryly.

"No, I can't say I have," he chuckled airily as Axel let out a vent of frustration and compulsively started brushing himself off.

"Fucking kids and... Fucking X... Fucking... Fuckers, fucking around..." Axel mumbled pissily, finally stopping and hugging himself. "Fucking kids... Fucking RUBBING on me, the... The fuck do they think they are...?"

When a loud smirk issued out of Riku's mouth, Axel whipped around and glared at the white-haired man.

"What the fuck is so funny?"

Riku shook his head, grinning broadly and rubbing his face with one hand for a moment.

"You... do realize how absolutely _retarded_ you sound, right?" he asked slowly, a hint of patronization lurking in his voice. But with Riku, the patronization was a good thing. It was a normal thing. Axel liked normal. At this point, normal was probably what he needed.

"Shut the fuck up," Axel kicked a can at him, failing miserably at an angry growl. There's just something about having a half smile on one's face that kills any sort of threatening aura. Riku kicked it back.

From there, the two sped up their pace. Axel told him the rest of what went on in Phoenix-- as unbiased as possible, though he did revert to the "fucking rubbing" rant at one point-- and Riku mostly listened. It helped. Their moods had lightened considerably, and by the time they'd reached the end of the alleyway, Axel decided he could try to give the newbie a chance to redeem himself. Riku was a blunt individual, and sometimes seeing things from the eyes of some such person could give you a new perspective. The kid might not have taken the drugs willingly. Unlikely, but possible. And Axel might not have seemed like it, but he was big into forgiving. Still, he didn't think he'd have come to that conclusion if he hadn't gone on the walk with Riku today.

Like Kairi had once told him, _"Everyone shares a bond with everyone they've come into contact with-- and sometimes, people they've never met at all. Sometimes the bonds are weak and result in pity, but then other times the bonds are strong and can merit a deep, natural understanding of one another."_

That was what he and Riku shared. A well-grounded level of understanding. And sometimes, that was all anyone needed.

* * *

**A/N:** It probably wasn't as funny to you as it is to me, but I tried anyway.

No offense meant to people who identify as emos, preps, or those of you who attend an Ivy League school. Roxas is just prejudiced against everybody. *laughs*

As of now I'm toning down the number of words per chapter so I can A. update more frequently and B. have a higher motivation to work on it. I'm sticking to a relative 6,000-8000 words or 10-12 pages sort of deal.

I really do want to finish this, you know. Much love for Ed, my beta. o3o

-PxC

**Ed's Fangirl Points Tally**

**Riku: 200 (Silly Riku Fangirl...)**

**Roxas: 100**

**Axel: 75**

**Kairi: 50**

**Paradox Child: 50 (xD Lol Ed)**

**Galileo: -50**

PS: Let it be known I do not like how uploading this killed off my dividers. =_= I almost didn't notice. And somehow, uploading this made it grow about 200 words. I'm worried.


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